Broken

I thought I was broken before my trip to Haiti. I thought I was broken enough when I returned from my trip to Haiti. But God keeps breaking me more and more as weeks pass by.

Obviously, I have a heart for the orphan and with each story of heart ache that I come across I think God can't break me anymore. And then He shows me another story of pain and loss.

Today I want to share one of those stories. It is the story about a little baby boy that I only knew about after returning from Haiti and since has gone to be with Jesus.

First, I have to back up several months when both Olivia and I had a discussion about adopting another child. I had been thinking to myself about a girl. Years ago, our family used to visit a sweet couple at the local nursing home and the woman's name was Ruby. I always liked the name Ruby and thought I would name my daughter Ruby if I ever have another daughter.

Well, during this discussion, Olivia shared with me that she thinks our family should adopt again and she thinks there is a girl named Ruby out there waiting for us.

A couple Sundays ago, Olivia and I had a discussion about Ruby again. Steve has not said 'yes' to another adoption but Olivia and I have been planting seeds for him hoping that some day adopting another child will become 'his' idea. But in the meantime, we talk and dream about a little girl named Ruby.

So, Olivia and I are sitting at the computer on a quest to find Ruby. Recently back from Haiti, we wondered if maybe Ruby is in Haiti. I came across a blog of a family going through their first adoption from Haiti. On there blog was a link to their daughter's orphanage..

We clicked on the link and the first blog post was a post about a little baby boy named "RuDy". Whoa! We were very taken back, especially when we first read it to be "RuBy". We read Rudy's story about his severe malnourishment and that he had just been relinquished to the orphanage.

Then we scrolled down to the next blog post, which was about a little girl named Olivia, a young girl who has a heart for orphans and who rallied her class to raise hundreds of dollars for the orphanage. Double Whoa!!

Baby Rudy has been in my thoughts and prayers. I stumbled upon the same orphanage site again today for the first time since that Sunday. I was struck with great sadness when I learned that Rudy had gone to live with Jesus last Friday. His little body was just too weak. Oh how my heart breaks for God's children who are suffering needlessly.

I don't know what all of this means for our family. But the more God breaks our hearts, the more motivated we are to help in some way. So, we continue to pray for God's guidance and direction. Please pray that our family hears God's specific assignment for us.