Out of Ethiopia . . . The Long Way Home

Turning a New Leaf

2012-01-25T07:51:00.000-06:00

We had a great 2011!

I'll be brief because I realize that it's been a very long time since I have blogged.

Olivia took up a new passion. She is now taking theater classes and hopes to be in a local production this summer. Avery continues to work the mats and the bars in her gymnastics classes. Lauren is deep into the ski season, actually it is almost over and they are now just able to ski on snow. Samson LOVES his preschool and music classes. He also continues to impress us with his dance moves, mostly break dancing.

In 2011 our family also became part of a new church plant in our community. We have been blessed with many new friendships.

After several months of advocating for an orphanage in Haiti and almost throwing in the towel, I am now taking a team to the orphanage for a vision trip. I had the opportunity to share their story in church one Sunday morning and after the service I was overwhelmed by the number of families who wanted to come along side me. 10 days after I spoke, we had airline tickets purchased for a team of 6 of us heading there TOMORROW! After we booked the flights, we had only 6 weeks to prepare. I'll write about our trip when I return.

At the same time we were making plans to travel to Haiti, Steve was wrapping up his most recent employment with a local printer. He is one of the 6 going to Haiti. What another blessing to be able to share this experience with him.

Please pray for our team going to Haiti, the people we will be coming in contact with and for our families who will be waiting for us back home.

Steve has been in transition for at least a couple months already, giving him opportunity to be home more, which has been great for family bonding. We are closer as a family than we have ever been. He hadn't realized how much he was missing at home until now.

It's always exciting to turn a new leaf. The adventure in not knowing the next steps can be exciting too but also a little scary. We don't know what the next thing is for our family and sometimes we can grow impatient waiting to find out. But we are at peace knowing that God's plan is the best plan for our lives and his plans are well worth waiting for.

Expressions from a four year old

2012-01-11T11:30:00.003-06:00

I haven't blogged for a very long time, so for now, I thought I would share some cute expressions from Samson's perspective.

When we were driving in the car together, just out of the blue Samson said, "I want to milk a cow!"
First I laughed because I thought, where did that come from? There was not a cow in sight and he all of a sudden wants to milk a cow? Truth be told, I've always wanted to milk a cow too. We may have to find a dairy farm soon to satisfy this urge.

One morning when we were in a hurry, I told Samson, "Quick! Get your shirt on! We have to go now!" Samson's reply back? "I will go as quick as a dog chews." I don't have any idea where that came from.

One day when he was racing his sister Avery upstairs Samson said, "The last one up has to eat cheap candy corn." This statement in itself is bizarre but to add to that, it wasn't even Thanksgiving season when you may have candy corn around in the house. He has one goofy imagination.

The other day, when he stepped out of the bathtub, he had a wet washcloth wrapped around his waist and said, "Mommy! I look like Jesus!"

We are also going through a phase of making up jokes. I remember when my girls were the same age and loved to make up jokes. They have all told jokes that don't make any sense and are so silly that they make us laugh anyway. But I don't know if they know they are not really that funny.

That's all I will share for now. My next post may be titled something like, "Turning a new leaf" because our family is waiting on the next thing. We know what ever lies ahead, we are going to be blessed but I have to admit, I am a bit fearful of the unknowns. I'll update soon!

Our $2 Day

2011-12-09T10:17:00.002-06:00

Almost half the world lives on less than $2 per day. A few organizations put together a challenge for families and individuals to try for just one day to feed our families on $2. Yesterday was the day.

When I first saw this challenge, I had "good" excuses to exclude our family: Lauren is in Nordic skiing and has vigorous workouts after school; my younger girls receive snacks during school and I couldn't ask them to turn down the snack. Also, kids would make fun of them if they brought a very small sack lunch. How would they explain to their friends this weird thing that their family decided to do?

What about Samson? He has already experienced severe hunger in his life. How could I expect him to eat so little for one day?

This challenge just was not a fit for our family.

Then the closer we got to the day of the challenge, I realized more and more that my excuses don't hold any water. The whole purpose of the challenge is to know how it feels to be in half of the world's population shoes just for one day.

The challenge is suppose to help us feel the same pain that a mother feels when they can't provide an adequate nutrient filled diet for their children. It must be one of the most difficult things to watch your child's health diminish, to watch them grow weak because you can't provide enough food to sustain them.

So, I decided that our family can do this. I started planning, like many parents all over the world plan each day, how I would provide for my family for this one day. I decided that I would eat less so that my kids could have more. I also made the decision to exempt Samson from the challenge because I don't want him to experience hunger again.

Days leading up to yesterday, I was beginning to feel what it's like to be a mother on a limited food budget. I told myself, how can I not experience this for just one day when mothers all over the world endure this challenge without a choice every single day.

I designed a menu. I did sacrifice my portions for my children. I packed a meager lunch for each of the girls. Without a complaint, they left the house with their lunch and agreed to not take the snack for the day. They had more confidence in themselves that they could do this than I had in them.

When I picked up the little girls from school, they were hungry but did not complain. Olivia shared with me that she explained the whole thing to her class. They asked her many questions. This sounded like it was a great learning opportunity for Olivia and her classmates.

Last night at the dinner table, Olivia thanked God for bringing our family through this experience. She was grateful!

I worried the most about Lauren. She is in Nordic skiing and she always needs a healthy snack after school to get her through practice. Yesterday was one of the most difficult practices they have had this year and she did it with no snack and very little to eat at lunch.

Her friends weren't as understanding or kind about it. They actually tried bribing her with food all during the lunch period. She said they thought it was weird. But she did not succumb to pressure and stuck with the challenge.

Lauren also had a AP Biology test today. Last night as she was going to her room to study, she looked weak and tired. I felt horrible for her and offered her more to eat so she could have the strength to study well for her test. But she turned down more food by saying, "kids who eat like this everyday must have to study for big tests."

When I put my little ones to sleep last night, I had a pounding headache. Avery also complained of feeling faint and weak. But I knew all of our headaches and our weakness would be gone in the morning. I knew that today we could eat a "normal" days worth of food and that we would all be fine.

It pained me to think about families who put their kids to bed hungry, wake up hungry and go day after day on little to eat. How selfish of me to at one time think that we could not do this even for one day.

Sometimes I convince myself that I am doing enough to fight injustice in this world. I have even asked God to release me of some responsibilities because at times I feel overwhelmed.

But in reality, I know I can do more. I don't really believe that God ever says,
"That's enough! You are doing too much!"

Sometimes I think we have to put ourselves in someone's shoes even if it is just for one day to give us the motivation to respond. We need to be stretched and challenged otherwise we run the risk of becoming desensitized by the needs around us.

Also, when we make it less about ourselves and more about Him, I know we can do so much more. Admittedly, I fear asking for more. That seems risky too.

However, I rather ask for more and take the risk of God using me to make a difference in the world than to do nothing and risk missing out on the adventure God has planned for me.

We love you Grandma June

2011-11-16T22:31:00.000-06:00

I lost my sweet, beautiful grandma June on November 1st. I love her so much and will miss her dearly. You know the story in the Bible when a crowd gathers around Jesus and the adults push there way to him but Jesus commands, "Let the little children come to me!" This story shows clearly that our Lord looks out for the little ones.

Well, this is the same image my grandma has left with me. She had a Christ-like character when it came to loving children. Wheelchair bound, she welcomed sometimes 2 children at a time to her lap and would adorn them with many hugs and kisses, telling them how much they had grown and how much she loved them.

The first time she met Samson, she was 89 years old and I was unsure how she would respond to him. But you know, that's another thing I will always remember about my grandma...she did not judge others. Never once did I ever hear her speak poorly about anyone else. She always thought of others first and she always had high regards for each person she ever came in contact with.

She embraced Samson with as much love and affection as she offered to his sisters. In fact at times she seemed to favor him. While other women about her same age were asking where he came from, calling him a "darky" and asking how I know he doesn't have aids, my grandma loved him unconditionally.

My grandma was also very generous despite having very little. When she lived in her assistant living place, the personnel would bring her to the local dollar store where she would buy little figurines to hand out to her visitors. The kids have several of these figurines.

Each time we visited, she wanted to give something to the kids, a piece of candy, an angel figurine or a small stuffed animal. She would look around her room at her very few possessions and come up with something that she could offer to each of the kids.

She lived to be 91 years old. The last week of her life, she was admitted to the hospital, placed on hospice and on a high dose of morphine.

During this week, she was visibly in a lot of pain. One day, on a whim, I decided to take Samson and drive to the hospital to see her.

She was not opening her eyes any longer and was unable to speak but when I held her hand, it was very evident that she was coherent. She responded to my talking by squeezing my hand and trying very hard to open her eyes and to talk.

After some time, I held Samson up to her and he gave her a kiss on her forehead and then he sang a few songs to her, like the ABC's and "I'm Bringing Home My Baby Bubble Bee". This obviously brought pure joy to her heart. She responded in such a way to Samson's presence I thought that for a moment she was about to open her eyes and speak. She grasped his little hand tightly into hers, not letting anything hold her back from showing her affection towards Samson one last time.

It is the hardest thing on earth to say good-bye to someone you know you will not see again on this side of heaven.

But I left that day with a happy heart too. I was happy that she would soon be free of her pain and in the arms of Jesus. What a comfort to know that my grandma knew where she was going and she knew Jesus.

She went home to be with Jesus that same evening.

We will miss you grandma June!

Really Cool New Shirts!

2011-11-15T08:59:00.000-06:00

We have the new Bring Love In T-shirts in the store now! Go check them out!

All proceeds go to help orphan and widows in Ethiopia.

Coming soon: some really amazing metal artwork. Make sure to check back often for more new items

More than we can handle

2011-10-17T20:46:00.000-05:00

You know the statement, "God never gives you more than you can handle?" Well, I share Katie Davis' perspective on this statement in that God absolutely, intentionally gives us more than we can handle.

Katie states that, He gives us more than we can handle "because this is when we surrender to Him and He takes over, proving Himself by doing the impossible in our lives."

Right now I am faced with the "impossible" because of my limited knowledge. I feel so directionless as an advocate for an orphanage in Haiti. But Katie's words encouraged me once again that God can turn this situation around. That maybe He is overwhelming me with the task so that I can die to myself and need more of Him.

I have followed up with the business man who showed interest in learning more about how he can help. He is still "thinking" about it. And although I have not given up hope, God has directed me to keep advocating and not to wait on this man.

There is an organization that I have been communicating with and they are interested in coming along side me in efforts to help the orphanage. They have people on the ground in Haiti and they are an organization that I have grown to know and trust the people who would work with me.

Several months ago, they entered into a very messy situation with another orphanage in the same city. There is evidence that this orphanage has been trafficking children and harvesting their organs among many other reported abuses. This has taken much of their time and energy.

Therefore, we will have to wait, which I'm fine with because it's important that the 75 children of this orphanage are freed of their bondage first. They are working on getting the orphanage shut down and then they will assist in placing each child in a safe and trusting orphanage.

In the meantime, they asked me to pull together a critical mass of people to help sponsor the children in Pastor Firmin's orphanage. I have pictures, names and ages of the children. I'm working on pulling together a monthly amount that would support each child.

At this time, I don't know how I'm going to present this or how I'm going to manage donors but I know in time God will show me how. Please pray for each of these 17 children. Pray whether God wants you to sponsor one of them. Together, we can make a difference for 17 children who desperately need our prayers, support and encouragement. Let's watch God figure this one out!

His Work

2011-10-17T13:43:00.001-05:00

I started reading the book, "Kisses from Katie". I am so inspired by Katie's life and the experiences she shares loving the people in Uganda. If you don't follow Katie's story, you may want to check out her blog. Her writing will fill you up.

In her book, she wrote this:

"For years before I went to Uganda, I had fantasized about doing something incredible for God and others; what I have learned is that I can do nothing incredible, but as I follow God into impossible situations, He can work miracles in and through me."

I LOVE this statement. We cannot by our own strength do anything great for God. But instead, God can do amazing things through us when we let Him use us.

For a little over a year our family along with friends of our family have come along side the Benkert family serving in Ethiopia, first through Drawn From Water and now with Bring Love In. We have been running the on-line store.

The Benkerts have thanked us over and over again for our support. But really, it should be us thanking them for this opportunity. I personally do not feel qualified or worthy of this work.

And when my friend Rachael and I sat down to design the new Bring Love In t-shirt, I admit, my creative juices were not flowing. They were interrupted by thoughts going through my head, like "why am I chosen for this work?" "Aren't there others who are far more qualified than I?"

Like Katie, I have always wanted to do something great for God. But when we let Him do the work, He can do more than we can imagine.

I can be creative but I have limited software skills and knowledge. This is where Rachael fits in - she has experience with design work and the software.

So, the two of us sat there and at the end of our time together, we came up with something very simple and basic. We forwarded this to the Benkerts for approval and they "loved" it.

Now, I know there is nothing wrong with simple and basic - I'm slowly learning that simple is best in life. However, I just was not sure about the design, like we hadn't put enough effort into it and did not give it our best shot. Maybe the Benkerts were just being kind by saying they loved it.

Rachael shared the same feelings as I. She expressed that given the time to focus and concentrate, she maybe could come up with something different.

Really when I think back, we were trying hard to come up with something amazing but maybe we weren't letting God in on the project. Plus we both allowed our own insecurities be a barrier to God's work.

I prayed that God would work through her and help her design something amazing - a design that would be unmistakably perfect for the new t-shirt. I am far from perfect but I know that God can use us to perfect His work.

The next day I received a text from Rachael to check my email. I went to my computer and downloaded several new files to my computer and what I pulled up were the most incredible design ideas for the Bring Love In t-shirts.

Around the same time, Bring Love In showcased their new leather cuff bracelets.

The new t-shirt design ideas included a design that resembled the design on the bracelets! At first glance, one would think that they were designed together. But this was not Rachael's plan to design them this way - God just made it happen this way. This is the design the Benkerts chose as their favorite!

We are so close to adding the new t-shirts to the store. We are so excited to see the finish product and we know you will like them. Plus this time we are offering both a men's and women's shirt. So, keep checking the store, it will be there soon - I promise!

I know that Rachael would agree with me that all of this is God's workmanship. We can not take any credit. I am so blessed to have this work - it brings pure joy in my heart just knowing that the work God has given me will help give orphans and widows a forever family.

Believe

2011-09-30T10:51:00.000-05:00

Our family has been blessed to come along side a couple ministries serving orphans in developing countries.

One of those ministries, serving in Ethiopia, is called Bring Love In. I have written about them before. They are serving widows and orphans in a unique way, bringing them together in forever homes. I will share more about our involvement and the ministry at another time. Check out their new on-line store. They are selling really cool handmade leather cuff bracelets. They had 300 made for the first run and they are already SOLD OUT! But more are being made, so if you want one, still place your order - you just may have to wait a little longer.

The other project that we are involved in is coming along side an orphanage in Haiti. As many of you know, Lauren and I traveled to Haiti about a year ago. While there we made some very special connections and have continued to build relationships with these connections via email or phone.

I knew that before I made the decision to go on this Short Term Mission trip that I wanted to stay involved and help in some way. So, I have maintained my connections and for the past several months, I have been advocating for this small orphanage located in the city of Carrfour. The orphanage is run by Pastor Firmin and his wife. They have 5 children of their own and have taken in 12 children orphaned from the earthquake.

Their home was destroyed by the earthquake and they now sleep in temporary shelters on their house property. Since the earthquake, they have had only one team from the US visit them.

One of the last update I received was heartbreaking. They had been without food for several days and they do not have the funds to enroll the children in school this fall. This is highly concerning because as you all may know, education is the ticket to survival in a developing country.

There are days, especially when I hear reports of families in the community having to give up their children or children starving to death, I feel overwhelmed and discouraged. Honestly, there are days I wish I could just say, "I can't do it" and walk away. That's hard to admit. But a couple weeks ago I spent 10 days in a row with thoughts of giving up. 10 days where I was numb. 10 days someone was waiting for me to respond.

I prayed during these 10 days but still I could not feel what direction God wanted me to go with this project. It became such a weight on my life. I felt like the future of this unknown to the the rest of the world orphanage all in my hands. I came so close to not responding. I wanted to pretend that I did not know about them. I know this sounds harsh but after being unsuccessful with soliciting help from those who do know, I was feeling a little beaten down. Discouragement set in and took control of me.

Just when I was about ready to give up, I read something about fasting. It was at that time that I decided that I had not done everything I could. It took all the strength that I could muster out of poor discouraged little me and I fasted and prayed for Pastor Firmin's orphanage.

I fasted and prayed for 2 days. On the second day of my fasting, I received a call from my contact with an update. This is the same person who had been waiting 10 days for me to respond. He informed me that the orphanage had been without food for 3 days and on the 4th day, they were given food. The day that they ate was the first day of my fasting.

He also had another praise to report: the school principal at the school the children attend has agreed to let the children begin the school year despite not having their tuition payment.

I went from feeling alone in this battle to understanding that God has been there the whole time.

I have heard that the combination of fasting and praying are the only way to unleash certain demons. So I consulted with a very wise and Godly man, someone I can trust will speak straight truth. He said that he believes that fasting and praying does not unleash demons but instead fasting and praying unleashes "UNBELIEF". There is more that I learned from this conversation but that was the basis of it.

Through my feelings of discouragement, I started to lose faith and disbelieve. But through the combination of fasting and praying, I have truly seen miracles.

And there is more...
Steve and I have been discussing a long term plan to help Pastor Firmin and his community sustain themselves. We have some ideas but it will involve a lot of time and resources.

So this week, just one day after the amazing update from my contact person, Steve just happened to share something about this orphanage to someone during a business lunch meeting. This person has asked for more information about the orphanage and will consider financially coming along Steve and I to achieve this long term plan. We have submitted all the information we have and now we are waiting on a response. So, please all you prayer warriors out there, please pray that God will work through this business man's heart to help bring down the financial barrier that is keeping us from accomplishing a long term goal for Pastor Firmin's community.

I share this story about praying and fasting, not to draw attention to myself but only to show you how God really does work miracles when we believe.

I think about how close I was to throwing in the towel on this project. Just think how much I would have missed out if I would have chosen to limit God.

So, my questions to you is, "Are there things that you have thought about turning your back to because it's just too much?" "Are you limiting God to just the things that you can physically and/or financially handle?" "Or, are you trusting and believing in Him to carry out the work that He has planned in advance for you to do?"

Really ask yourself these questions when you are at a crossroads. Because once you turn your back, God cannot use you. Are you allowing doors to close? Or are you persevering through the doors that are open maybe even just a crack to allow God to accomplish more through you?

Water

2011-09-20T09:06:00.002-05:00

You hear about families in developing countries walking miles and miles to fetch dirty water for drinking, cleaning and bathing. This water contains bacteria that can cause diseases and death in children. But without water, we can die too. It's an unfair predicament that millions face each day.

Samson's birth family does not have access to clean drinking water. When we talk about his life before he joined our family, the fact that some people live without a clean drinking source is unthinkable to him.

He asks me questions like, "Well, why don't we give them some of our water? We have plenty." It's not that simple but yet he does notice our abundance.

And then just a couple days ago, he asked, "If my birth family doesn't have clean drinking water, why don't they go somewhere that does?"

Based on our conversations and all his questions, what he wants for his birth family more than anything is to see them some day have access to clean water.

This past summer when we got together with my friend Tanya and her sons, Samson's buddies from his orphanage, she told me about a triathlon that she was part of to raise money for a water project in our boys' home town Mudula, Ethiopia.

Samson was born in a village outside of Mudula. At this time I am still unsure of whether this fresh water project will reach his particular village but after communicating back and forth with one of the organizers of the project, I have learned that there is a strong chance that his birth family's village will benefit.

When completed, this project is said to reach 10,000! That's 10,000 people who currently drink from an unsanitary source; that means hundreds of women and girls who no longer have to walk for hours to fetch water from a stream but now can spend that time in school instead; that means diseases and death will be cut down dramatically. And for children like Samson, this is a big wish come true!

If you are interested in financially coming along side this water project, go HERE to make your donation. I like my friend Shannon's idea and that is, to challenge each of you to give the amount that your water bill is each month. Is it $50, $100, $200? What are you willing to pay to have clean water each month? Can you donate that amount today?

His First "First Day"

2011-09-13T08:46:00.000-05:00

I just returned home from dropping Samson off at his first day of preschool. As you may recall, he went to preschool last year but didn't start on the first day of preschool so this is his first "First Day" of school experience.

Last year my emotions were filled with excitement for him. I was persistent and fought for him to be in preschool last year. So, when he was finally able to start in October, I was ready to let him go and experience a world outside of our home. I was not nervous or sad really. Just excited.

This morning I learned that there is something about being there the first day of school that can trigger different emotions.

After we pulled into the parking lot, we watched a father walk his son hand in hand across the street, stop for a moment in front the school bell for a photo opportunity and then proceed into the school.

Then, we watched another mom and dad escort their son into the school shortly after. I thought to myself, two boys Samson doesn't know but will soon be his new friends.

We found his locker right away and as he was taking off his jacket, I looked towards the door of the preschool and saw another dad who was familiar to me holding his apprehensive son's hand. Upon seeing Samson, the dad said, "Look! There is Samson!" in hopes to bring comfort to his son.

As we approached the sign in table outside the classroom door, we were warmly greeted by another familiar face, the preschool teacher. We watched on while yet another little boy signed his name with his parents standing along side him.

I know this family enough to know that this is their first child they would be sending off to school. I could see on her face that the mother was at peace about letting go of her son. The father, on the other hand was trying so hard to hold back his emotions. I almost lost it myself when I heard him choking back tears as he came away from the sign in table with his son and gave him one last hug before he vanished into the classroom.

Inside the classroom, I snapped a couple pictures of Samson with each of his teachers. He took one quick look around the room, gave me one last hug and was off to do their first project for the day.

His teacher handed me a note as I left the classroom. When I walked out, I ran into a family I know bringing their son to preschool. The dad was taking all kinds of pictures and had a huge smile on his face, obviously so proud of his son.

There were so many sweet moments, watching proud fathers with their sons, taking pictures, giving them one last hug before their first day, comforting them. Watching these fathers is what stirred my emotions this morning. To see their love and care for their sons in action was so touching. There were a few moms there too but it was the fathers who were nervous and emotional. I tried to be strong and thought I was doing a good job holding in my emotions until I got to my van and read this note from the teacher:

"I gave you a little wink and a smile as yo entered my room today.
I know how hard it is to leave and simply walk away.

You've been together for several years. You've been a loving guide.
But now the time has finally come, to leave your child by my side.

Just know that as you drive away and tears may start to flow,
I'll love your child as I would my own and help your little one to grow.

Know your child will be safe and loved as we work and learn each day."

"Ruby" continued

2011-08-23T08:51:00.002-05:00

We have had a crazy busy last couple weeks and I want to share soon some of the things our family has been up to but first I need to share something that happened already a few weeks ago.

If you have been following my blog, you know that the name "Ruby" continues to come up, almost to the point that our family is a little "spooked" by it.

If you have been following my blog, you also know how passionate I am about drawing awareness to human trafficking. I hadn't blogged about human trafficking specifically for a while, so I sat down to write a blog post about provocative dress and how it feeds to human trafficking.

I thought I would start with searching the Internet for this topic. I started to google "provocative dress human trafficking" and then I wondered if I wasn't going to get a bunch of stuff I really didn't want to see, so I backed spaced over those words and typed,

"modest dress human trafficking".

The very first link that displayed in my google search was for a website called...

"Ruby Eyed Okapi".

Not kidding!

Ruby Eyed Okapi is a website designed by a group of women who share the same passion that I do and blog about things like modest dress and purity. They also write book, TV show and movie reviews.

That blog post I sat down to write? I never even started because these women do an excellent job putting the very thing I have been thinking into words.

Check out the website for yourself! Show it to your teenage daughters!

One of my favorite posts is the bikini post.

I was visiting my sister a few weeks ago and brought my girls and niece to the mall one evening. While we were passing store fronts, I was horrified to see full size posters of young teenage girls dressed provocatively. I have seen this before but now I'm paying more attention.

One store caused my jaw to drop more than any other. It appeared to be a store just for teenage lingerie. The full sized banner at the front of the store was advertising a push up bra on a 15 year old girl with the words, "Check out (whatever the girl's name was here) and her new look!" The model was wearing nothing but underwear and a push up bra!

What kind of message our we sending to our teenagers?! I know the message it is sending to at least one teenage girl:

My teenage daughter recently shared with me a conversation among girls her age where one girl told the others that when she turns 18 her mom said she can get a breast enlargement. Then the girl went on to say that if she ever ended up pregnant after being raped, her mom said that she would get an abortion.

Do you think that she may increase her risks of getting raped with a breast enlargement? Do you think plastic surgery of this kind is contributing to our sex crazed culture? Do you think that our sex crazed culture creates more of a need for prostitution?

If so, then provocative dress does feed into human trafficking. Many women and boys are forced into prostitution because of the demand for sex. This demand is increasing at a rate that by the end of 2011 it will surpass the #1 illegal money making industry in the world, which is drugs.

With three daughters, I am convicted and I admit that I'm not completely innocent. I know first hand experience as a mom how hard it is to say "no" to the culture. But that is our job as a parent. We do have a say in what our children are wearing when they leave the house! Take a stand moms for what is right!! Don't let your girls leave the house not covered up!

Up North

2011-08-02T09:00:00.000-05:00

Our family's favorite vacation spot is "Up North". A couple weeks ago, we rented a cabin on a small lake for four nights. We went boating, hiked, fished, kayaked, canoed, ate, saw eagles, heard wolves howl and went alpine sledding. Minus the extreme humidity for 2 days, its was total bliss!

Freedom

2011-07-30T22:00:00.002-05:00

At the U2 concert, one of the first things Bono said as we all cheered and raised our hands in praise for him, was "We can celebrate our freedom here but in many places in our world ...."(I don't recall his exact words but you get the idea)

Before the concert, Steve and I were sitting on a ledge outside the gates. There were volunteers running around with clipboards asking for signatures for different causes. They were causes that dealt with injustices in different parts of the world. They were causes fighting against and drawing awareness to very heartbreaking situations. Steve and I gladly signed our names because well, they just merely asked for a signature, that's it and we thought the causes warranted a voice to be heard.

But each time someone approached us, they had the look of that fear of another rejection. Then each person looked surprised when we agreed to sign their petition. One volunteer even told us how this job was much more difficult than she expected and thanked us over and over.

All three petitions that were going around were backed up and approved by Bono himself. They expected close to 58,000 people to attend the concert. Outside the gates, we were among several hundred (maybe even thousands) U2 fans waiting to enter the gates. After each petition signing volunteer left us, we watched them go from person to person, facing rejection after rejection. In fact most people waved them on before they had a chance to speak one word to them.

I was blown away by watching this!

Do they not want to know how bad things are in other parts of the world?

I turned to Steve and said, "Wow! People really don't have any idea what's going on in the world, do they?"

One petition was for the UN to draw awareness of the famine that is affecting more than 11 million people in the Horn of Africa. This is close to my heart because included in these 11 million people could likely be Samson's birth family.

Is this why it matters to me? Yes, I suppose so.

I also believe that stories of injustice come to life and seem real when we put faces to the stories. millions of people starving to death for example, doesn't pull at our hearts as much as the picture of a family with the story of how the parents sold 2 of their 5 children standing in the picture so they could feed the remaining 3.

In regards to the hundreds who would not sign the petitions, well, I can't judge them by their actions mostly because they just don't know. They are disconnected from the rest of the world.

So, maybe since I know and understand, maybe it's my job to educate. Maybe it's my job to tell the stories to those who are so far removed from what is happening in the the world.

I have many stories to tell, most shared second hand. But let me start with this one. The sample story I described above, is not a sample. I've described a real family and real circumstances. Would it make a difference if I had a picture of this family with their 5 children?

A family of 7 will soon become a family of 5 if their situation doesn't change soon. (To my knowledge, the family is still in together.)

This is a real family: father, mother and five children, 9 years old and younger. The youngest is 3 months old, the 2 year old severely malnourished and on the brink of death.

When I asked how does a family decide which two to sell, I was told that they will sell which ever 2 someone will take for their slaves.

This family lives in a developing nation. They are so desperate that they will sell or may even end up giving 2 children away just so the rest of family can survive.

Up the street from this family is the town's "middle class". "Hidden" in the open are domestic child slaves EVERYWHERE!

I bet the people waiting outside the gate for the U2 concert hadn't heard about this family of 7. They don't know the stories. They don't have a face to put on the injustice.

Steve and I have decided that it's time to step up the anty (is that how you spell it??) and start educating people. Like really finding ways to be the voice against injustice. So this is one of my purposes for sharing this story with you today.

This family of seven attends a local church. The pastor of the church and his family are already struggling to support their own 6 children and several other orphans that they have taken in.

I'm working on helping this pastor so that he doesn't have to continue to watch family after family give up their children. He has recently visited this family of 7 in their home (if you want to call it a home). The two year old is weak, does not walk or talk. She is not expected to survive.

I have been thinking this over for several days, trying to think of a way I could help this church and its community because I know I can't do it alone.

So today I come to you with a request. First, please pray for freedom of oppressed people all over the world.

Then, if you feel led to make a contribution to my pastor friend, please leave a comment with your email address and I will send you details on how you can help. I will not publish your comments.

I know that if you feel God leading you to help this particular pastor, that you are walking out on faith and not by sight. I know this is a lot to ask. But if you are interested, I will share more of the story, where this community is located and pictures.

Thank you for your time!

U2

2011-07-26T08:27:00.000-05:00

I am a huge Bono fan! Some people think of him as no more than a rock star. What they don't know about him is his love for ALL people around the world.

In the early 1990s (I believe), Bono travelled to Africa for the first time. Actually, he travelled to Ethiopia. He was so struck by the poverty and the devastation of AIDS, he returned to the US a different person than when he left.

He set out on a mission to help with the AIDS epidemic and alleviate poverty. He set up the non profit, ONE campaign (go check it out if you are not familiar with it) and was spearheaded the talks with the US government that resulted in forgiving Africa's debt and providing life saving medications for AIDS victims in Africa.

And, the coolest thing about him is that he is a Born Again Christian. And the other 3 members of his band are also Christians!

Back in early May when we attended Lauren's orchestra concert, someone was selling raffle tickets for the U2 concert. Steve bought 2 tickets for $10 per ticket.

I left that night thinking, "Well, that was a donation going towards a good cause."

Several weeks later, I had already forgotten about the raffle tickets when Steve and Avery arrived home from somewhere. Steve had just taken a call on his cell phone and Avery shared the news that we won the tickets to the U2 concert!!

They were prime seats, worth $250 per ticket and selling on-line for $500 per ticket!!

So, this past Saturday, Steve and I attended the most amazing and incredible concert we will probably ever attend in our life here on earth.

Just a glimpse into our evening:

Mehaber

2011-07-14T23:44:00.000-05:00

I don't have much time for words but wanted to post these sweet pics from the Mehaber last weekend. We had an amazing time meeting new friends and reconnecting with those we already knew and have a special place in our hearts.

This young man in the orange remembered Samson from the orphanage. The first time the two have seen each other in almost 2 years.

These two have stayed in touch since home. They connected again like brothers at the Mehaber and were inseparable.

Ethiopian dance lessons!

Ruby

2011-07-13T21:28:00.000-05:00

I have written about the name "Ruby" before. Today I hesitated to write and share some more but decided that whether I publish this or not, I need to document this. I hesitate to share because this story is all so bizarre and I feel a little weird about it. But it is a story that has left our family searching and wondering what this all means.
If you don't feel like reading my past posts about Ruby, I'll quickly bring you up to speed and tell you that this name continues to come up over and over again. It is too often to be a coincidence, like God is really trying to get our attention.

Two weeks ago while Olivia was gone to camp, Samson and Avery were in dance camp. When we arrived at dance camp the first day, the director explained to us that all the kids are broken up into "cabins" and directed us to find our child's cabin name on this list.

Samson's cabin was "Hero".

Avery's cabin was "Ruby".

One of the times that God whispered the name "Ruby" to us was through Samson. When he came out of his first gymnastics class this past spring, he whispered in my ear, "Mommy, there is a girl in my class and her name is and in a very quite whisper he pauses and says, "Ruby". At the time, he knew nothing of our stories of Ruby. I wrote about this already but just had to share again because of what I'm going to share next.

"Mighty to Save" is our family's song. We have a testimony surrounding this song that I will share sometime. Essentially, God used this song to speak to our family many times throughout our journey to Samson. Soon after we were home, when "Mighty to Save" came over the radio, Samson at one point said, "Hey! This is MY song!". At the time, he spoke very little English and he had no way of knowing the significance of this song and how it ties to our journey to him. In fact, at his age, he would not really understand our testimony that surrounds this song.

Now, back to dance camp... Avery came home her first day of camp and was excited to tell me that her group was going to be performing to "Mighty to Save". I know! It gave me goose bumps too!! Not only was she in cabin "Ruby" but she was also dancing to our family's song.

Our friends just returned from Ethiopia with their twin boys and brought home some amazing gifts for our family. One was a children's book about the origins of coffee in Ethiopia.

I read this book to Avery and Samson Tuesday, June 28th, the same day they had their first day of dance camp. I remember it being 9:00 p.m. because I was thinking it was late and I should have had them to bed earlier so they would be more rested for camp in the morning.

Anyway, in the book, this young boy has a dream about the stars in the Ethiopian night sky looking like red rubies.

Then on Thursday that same week, I picked up Olivia from camp. She could not wait until we dropped off her friend because she had something important to tell me.

She first asked me what our family was doing at 9:00 Tuesday night. I just told her that I was reading a book to Samson and Avery at that time.

She told me her story before I told her anymore about our day:

She was at chapel Tuesday night and the name "Ruby" came to her mind. She claimed that at that very moment, they began worshipping to "Mighty to Save". She said she had this overwhelming feeling that God was also speaking something to us at that very same time. She said, she looked at her camp counselors watch and it was exactly 9:00, which was the same time and day I was reading our new story book to the kids.

Again, I don't believe this is a coincidence!

We don't know what this all means. We have been praying. We are trying to be patient and we are excited to see how God plays this one out.

A glimpse into our summer

2011-07-06T21:23:00.001-05:00

Wow!! I was on someone else's blog the other day and noticed that it listed that the last update on my blog was 2 weeks ago. Oops!! So, if I still have any readers with me, here is just a little about what has been happening the past few weeks...

We started off our summer with cold weather and rain. So, the girls and I did some much needed deep cleaning through drawers, cabinets and closets. I was happy to see the warm weather finally arrive the beginning of July so that I had a good excuse to not clean anymore.

At the end of June, June 26th to be exact, Steve and I had the privilege to drive our friends home from the airport after arriving home from Ethiopia. What a treat it was to meet their 2 precious sons and hear about their adventures. Now we have someone that we can connect with at a very unique level. The next night Samson got to meet his new friends for the first time. I held back tears all day anticipating that moment. And it was very special indeed.

When July hit, things got busy!!!

Steve started taking sailing lessons, only one so far because of the weather of course.

Lauren started driver's training.

Over 4th of July weekend, we hit the beach one evening, attended a play in our community, shot off fireworks and took Samson to his first ever baseball game. On our way to the game, we were trying to explain to him why he would not be playing and that we were going to watch young adult men play. He seemed to be OK with that arrangement once we got there but was a little confused at first about what "going to a baseball game" was all about.

Avery is at Bible camp this week. Olivia was there last week and Lauren 2 weeks before then. Can't wait to pick my little June up from camp tomorrow!

Also, this week, we are hosting my niece while her sister is at camp with Avery.

I came home from a lunch meeting this afternoon to fresh baked cookies the girls made. They said they thought the recipe asked for too much butter, so they only put half the amount in that it called for. They were shocked to learn that the recipe was not wrong. But, you know what?? The cookies turned out great! I think I'll be cutting back the butter from now on!! LOL!!

The kids have enjoyed squirt gun fights in the back yard on the real hot days. Today I noticed Samson used the garden hose for his squirt gun and was making the girls scream as he chased them all over our yard.

Last week Samson and Avery attended dance camp. They performed a dance with just the boys and Samson is an amazing dancer! During the dance, they featured each boy and Samson did some funky break dancing kind of moves on the floor. It was so fun to watch him enjoy this!

Avery also danced very well. She is so precise and disciplined with her dance moves.

At the end of the week, Samson was talking about one of his friends who was part of the dance camp. He said, "Mommy, I was watching S... dance and she is a pretty good dancer. I think I'll marry her some day."

The biggest news of the summer is that Samson is riding bike WITHOUT training wheels! He insisted on getting his training wheels taken off and now he is completely fearless with his bike. There is just no slowing him down!

He has managed to keep the scrapes and bruises to a minimum on his bike. But the other day I must admit that I accidentally sat down on a stool with his big toe underneath the leg. OUCH!! Now he has a black and blue toe. The cute thing is that when he shows it to others, he calls it his "thumb" toe instead of his big toe.

I have many more things to blog. Hopefully more to come next week! Stay tuned.....

Magical Dates?

2011-06-17T07:57:00.000-05:00

This morning Steve and I are taking our good friends to the airport. They are flying to Ethiopia to bring home their sweet boys. We insisted on driving them to the airport and picking them up not only because it is a privilege but because when we came home from our exhausting 36 hours of travel and drove ourselves home, well, let's just say, it was not a good thing and it's a miracle that we made it home.

When our family went through the process of adopting Samson from Ethiopia, we only had to travel once and that was for the Embassy appointment. Today, the process has changed and now the families are required to travel twice, once for the Ethiopian court date and once for the Embassy date.

Our friends were in Ethiopia just last month for their court date. They passed court on May 16th.

We did not attend our Ethiopian court date for Samson but we passed court on June 16th, same day as Olivia's birthday. So, we had much to celebrate yesterday!

The date Samson was relinquished to the orphanage was April 16th.

Then, on December 16th, we passed court in the US to finalize his adoption. This is also Olivia's half birthday.

When we were in Ethiopia, we celebrated Samson's half birthday on August 11th, which is our friend Ryan's birthday and my brother's birthday.

So all these dates, the 11th, the 16th have gotten me thinking about what they all mean. What do they mean for our family and what do they mean for our two families. Is there a Bible verse attached somehow? Is it confirmation for something?

There is more...

Ryan and Rachael were at the airport to greet us when we arrived home with Samson. It was their wedding anniversary.

Steve and I will be picking up our dear friends and their boys at the airport on June 26th, which is our wedding anniversary.

I love when God does things like this. He is magical, mystical and mysterious all in one.

Turning 12!

2011-06-16T09:57:00.001-05:00

Twelve years ago today, Olivia came into this world. I remember the delivery like it was yesterday. I was in labor at home, Steve called the hospital to tell them and they told him to tell me to just take a bath and that the contractions should go away. This was my second full term pregnancy so I knew what full blown labor felt like. I was in labor and I could feel the baby dropping by the minute!

By the time Steve called the hospital the 3rd time, I told him to not ASK if we could come in but to TELL them we were on our way!

My contractions were very close together. I could barely make it to the car and was not going to buckle my seat belt. It was 10:18 p.m. and Steve sped the few blocks we were from the hospital. He pulled up to the ER door. The ER nurse took one look at me, put me in a wheel chair and sprinted to the other side of the hospital to the labor and delivery wing. It took 3 minutes to arrive to a room they had prepared for me and I remember having a contraction sometime during that fast wheelchair ride.

After losing her heart rate several times, adding much stress to a couple more hours of labor, I gave birth to our beautiful baby girl. Steve informed me days later that the umbilical cord was wrapped around her neck and had to be unwrapped quickly before the final push, which would explain why we kept losing her heart beat.

Olivia had the most beautiful, porcelain colored skin as a baby. As she approached toddler age, her blond hair and jeweled dark brown eyes gave her a real striking look.

Her all time favorite pass time is playing with Barbies. In fact, Avery and her dug out the Barbies just yesterday and brought them outside to play with them on the trampoline.

Olivia has always been our joke teller. She also loves imitating movie or TV show characters, such as the kids on "The Little Rascals".

I will always remember her favorite color through her toddler and lower elementary years was red. She always wore red tennies, had a red sweat suit, red cowboy boots, a red cowboy hat and many red shirts. She still looks great in red! But I think purple is her favorite color now.

I found these pictures and I am missing those years of getting away with dressing the girls all alike.

Some more things about Olivia:

She is a gifted artist.

She is a dog lover.

She is conscientious.

She loves to take care of her younger brother and sister and is a very trusted babysitter.

She plays the guitar.

She is a wise decision maker and very pragmatic.

She has the most adorable dimples on each cheek.

She is a friend to everyone.

My girl all grown up!:

Long Term Support

2011-06-09T09:02:00.000-05:00

Our family is part of a new church plant in our community. Our pastor has asked Steve and I to take the lead on global missions for our church.
We have been doing massive amounts of reading and learning the best approach and models to follow when stepping into a project in a developing country. We have made connections with people running organizations and have continued those relationships. The information we have taken in has been eye opening, overwhelming, interesting and for the most part has caused our views and our understandings to be the opposite of how we use to think. It's been very humbling to say the least.

We hope to educate others through all that we have learned. (Disclaimer: we do not know everything and will not ever know everything but our hope is that others will be intrigued enough to learn along with us.)

I'm writing this blog post today to share one piece of advice with you. And that is, unless you are willing to sell all of your possessions yourself, pick up and move your family to a developing country, support those who have made the LONG TERM commitment to serve in a different culture.
According to David Platt's "Radical Together", there are over 10,000 people groups in the world. And today, there are still 6,000 people groups that have not heard the Gospel.

Ideally, the work of spreading the Gospel is less costly through indigenous people. However, in many areas of the world, the Gospel has to be brought there first. Then the indigenous people need guidance and discipling, which can take years.

Many people are confused and don't understand the work of missionaries. I believe that the #1 reason why some are skeptical is that we live in a culture of wanting quick results. We want to see the fruit of the labor now.

Most of us have heard the stories of missionaries living in areas for decades, maybe even are martyred and only a few come to Christ. This is quite the price to pay and a lot of time invested. But someone has to do it! And just because it is a difficult culture to convert, doesn't mean we walk away.

I personally know missionaries who are serving in parts of the world where there is civil war and lots of unrest. They may be there for several years before they lead ONE person to the Lord.

Discipling takes time. Back in the US, we want to hear reports about how many orphanages are being supported or how many churches are being built but the only thing that missionaries may be building is relationships. To us back home, sometimes hearing about the relationships isn't enough for us. We measure progress in numbers: How many people have they saved? How many children attended VBS? How many orphans did they feed this month?

If we measure progress by material goods or by numbers, we will be disappointed in the progress our missionaries are making. When we allow ourselves to become disappointed, we tend to judge the work God has given them, thus we sometimes walk away from those who are truly doing God's work.

One question I hear consistently is "Why is this missionary family living in a decent house?" Another common question I hear is "Why do they need a $40,000 vehicle to drive?" AND "If they are living in a developing country, why does it cost so much to support them?"

These are questions that I used to ask myself. But over time, my questions have been answered. For one, I know that vehicles are far more expensive than what we pay in the US. And, road conditions are such that unless you own a 4 wheel drive, you can't get anywhere.

Missionaries to developing countries in particular, most often move across the ocean, away from friends and family, immerse themselves into another culture, learn a new language, minister in unfamiliar surroundings and face uncomfortable and sometimes dangerous situations. How much more uncomfortable do we want our missionaries to live? Are our missionaries also suppose to go without transportation and live in a hut without running water?

Are you questioning the work of missionaries you support? Get to know them better. We have 3 sets of friends who are living as missionaries in developing countries. All will be in the US for the next few months on furlough. I plan to meet with them, spend some time with them and ask them many questions. My goal is to learn more about the work God has assigned each family, ask God for discernment and let the Holy Spirit direct our family's giving from there.

So, when you are deciding on whether your financial support is being channeled the best way possible to further His kingdom, get to know the missionaries you support. Meet with them when they are back on furlough, get to know their hearts. Ask lots of questions and really get a good understanding of the purpose they are serving.

Never judge the work of a missionary. Don't look for immediate fruit especially in situations where it could take decades for hearts to change. The work of missionaries is complicated and often times messy work. They deserve our support and encouragement.

New Ministry in Addis to take in street kids

2011-05-28T07:57:00.002-05:00

Some of you have been following the Drawn From Water story. This is an organization that served in southern Ethiopia rescuing children from tribes where they drown them because of superstitious beliefs that they are cursing the tribe.

This group rescued over 30 children in all, built an orphanage for them and cared for their every need. Then a few months ago, through a tragic set of unexpected circumstances, they lost the orphanage.

We have been coming along side DFW by operating their on-line store, selling and shipping t-shirts. We sold over 400, which gives you an idea of what kind of support system they have behind them.

They looked at options to partner with other groups rescuing mingi children. But for Levi and Jessie, one of the couples involved in DFW, the door shut on this kind of work.

They began talking to government officials in the capital city, Addis and after much prayer and consideration, they are now working on plans to bring in street children. From all that I have learned about caring for the orphan, their vision is right on track.

Please go to bringlov.in and learn more about their vision.

After following their blog, what strikes me the most about Levi's posts is the question, "where are the girls?"

Advocating against human trafficking is something God has been stirring in my heart for several months. Steve and I attended workshops at the summit to learn more. I have been researching the topic and involved in some overseas activities in the fight against trafficking.

So when Levi and Jessie's plans began to take on a new focus, taking street kids into homes, I saw this as human trafficking prevention.

And the answer to the question, "where are the girls?" Many of them, about 20,000 per year out of Ethiopia alone, are trafficked out of the country into the slave trade.

With all that said, there was no doubt in my mind that I would continue on with Levi and Jessie in their efforts to now bring in kids off the street and love on them.

We (those of us involved in running the on-line store for DFW) will be working with bringlove.in much in the same capacity. We are honored and so excited to stay by their sides and assist them with getting this project off the ground. I will share more as more unfolds.

Stepping out on faith

2011-05-27T08:22:00.001-05:00

I received an urgent phone call this week in regards to a situation that God has pulled me into.

It's very complicated and I can't share details but it involves orphans.

I'm embarrassed to admit that it's a situation that I had asked God to close the door so that I could move on. It's such a messy situation, that it's escalated to something way beyond me.

Although I continued to pray, I thought that I had done all I could. Then the phone call came. It was heavy stuff. As I listened to the details, I was praying that God would give me wisdom and selfishly wanted to run away from this.

After a 1 hour phone conversation, discussing the plan, which at this point, has become plan C, I prayed. I asked God, "Why me?"

And while I was praying, He said, "If not you, then who?"

Before this prayer, I did not have the strength to take the next step. I was feeling unequipped at how to approach this.

But then I realized that God is right. I need to act now. I need to do what I know how to do and let God take it from there.

So, I took the next step, which involved sharing the situation with someone on the field and asking for help.

Then I left it in God's hands. I didn't know whether I would ever hear from this person or not. But I prayed that this person would have an answer, that they would be able to at least guide me to the next step.

I prayed that my message would not fall of deaf ears and that this person will take note and understand the urgency of the situation.

Two days passed, I wasn't ready to give up but I needed to hear soon.

Let me just say, GOD IS AMAZING!!!! WOW!! WOW!! WOW!!!!

Yesterday, I received a response. This person offered to help in a much bigger way than I even prayed for or expected. We have a lot of details to work through, but WOW!!!

I am so humbled by God's response. This may have been beyond me but it's not beyond God.

Today, I've been thinking about how insecurities keep us from acting. We think the hard work is just for the professionals or experienced people. But I am evidence that all you need on your resume to do God's work, is the right heart.

When we take that leap of faith, God shows up in a BIG way!! He is right there with you! Why does this surprise us when we take a big leap?

There is still much to work through, the work is not done yet. Please pray with me that God will take this to completion and that all the glory will go to Him.

Conference Recap

2011-05-18T19:07:00.001-05:00

Steve and I returned from Louisville Sunday after attending the Orphan Summit. First of all, this was yet another humbling experience for me. We arrived on Wednesday to take in the "FREE TO LIVE" tour with the Desperation Band, Merideth Andrews and an appearance by Children's Hopechest's CEO Tom Davis.

The worship was amazing! The tour is focused on raising awareness for human trafficking - something close to my heart. Midway through the concert, they showed a video of a girl named Sasha from Russia. Through a translator, Sasha told her story of how after aging out of an orphanage, she was lured in by men who did terrible things to her. Sasha was able to escape and was taken in by one of Children's Hopechest's rehabilitation homes for trafficked girls. Through their help, Sasha has been able to hold down a job, is now married and has a beautiful two year old daughter with her husband.

Watching the video of her describing how God transformed her life through people who she could trust, brought on the tears.

Then, guess what? They surprised us all by bringing Sasha out on stage! They flew her from Russia to the US to be part of the tour! This was her first time ever on a plane - beautiful young woman, beautiful two year old daughter, beautiful story of redemption.

Like I said, this was an incredible concert and time of worship but the highlight of this evening was that we GOT TO MEET TOM DAVIS!! He is one of my favorite authors! I'm a HUGE FAN!! I brought his book "Scared", for him to sign for Lauren. She is also a big fan of his. I have had communications with Tom before this conference (advocating for ministries in Haiti and Ethiopia) but this was my first time to meet him in person.

We also met Merideth Andrews and John, the lead singer of the Desperation Band.

The very next morning, Steve and I attended Tom Davis' workshop on human trafficking. We heard more heart wrenching stories and learned of shocking statistics. One that sticks out in my mind is that there are 20,000 children trafficked from Ethiopia alone each year! He talked about how prevention is the KEY! Rescuing is messy and dangerous and rehabilitation is lengthy and costly. The easiest way to help combat human trafficking is through prevention.

The general sessions throughout the conference were loaded with amazing testimonies of how lives have been changed. One testimony that will forever be in my memory is the interview between Dennis Rainey, Bob Lapine and Carolyn Twietmeyer. If you don't already know about Project Hopeful, go take a look and read about this incredible ministry that comes along side parents through HIV adoptions. We also had an opportunity to meet Carolyn and her husband Kiel. Very down to earth, personable couple!

One of the biggest eye openers of the conference was what we learned from speaker and author of "When Helping Hurts", Brian Fikkert. Wow! EVERYTHING he said made sense! The most convicted I have been in a long time! Lots of OUCH moments!

The big picture to understand and come away with is that as Westerners, we often times think that we know the answers to how to fix poverty. We arrive in developing countries with a savior attitude. What we think the problem is impacts how we respond and what we do. But too often we go into a developing community with a superior attitude, thinking we are better because we have the so called resources to "help", not aware that as we get more prideful, they get more shame.
The western culture defines poverty in material terms. Around the world, the answers about poverty are more sociable, such as low self esteem, shame, etc.
But poverty is about broken relationships.

So, the first steps to take towards poverty alleviations are to repent of a material understanding of the world, then repent of our pride and god-complexes. Lastly, repent of the health and wealth or prosperity Gospel.

When we look at poverty as being rooted in relationships, we are all poor. We are all broken. Unless we can admit to our own brokenness and repent, we will be ineffective in the lives of those we try to come along side.
Fikkert also talked about how we can often times be the cause to someones material poverty. He gave the following example to illustrate how we can be enablers instead of helping:

Mary is a woman who has been standing outside the same McDonald's for years asking for money. People who live in the area are familiar with her and give her money each time they see her. Why has Mary been there for years? It's because people still give her money. But money is not what Mary needs. What she needs is someone to come along side her to help her realize her gifts and give her guidance to find a way to make a living by using her gifts and talents. But this is easier said than done. It's easy to just give money. It's not as easy to give of our time.

He also gave the example of how us Westerners like to bring things like clothing and shoes to hand out to the poor. When we do this, we may be putting local shoe makers and seamstresses out of business.

We can do more harm when we provide relief in a situation that calls for development. Relief is needed only when there are immediate needs and for temporary emergency aid.

For example, after Haiti experienced an earthquake, they needed relief help. This devastation left millions helpless. They needed immediate help and resources to get them back on their feet again, to stop the bleeding.

Once the bleeding stops, then you work towards rehabilitation and then onto development, which promotes an empowering process.

According to Mr. Fikkert, the vast majority of those we serve need development. However the vast majority of the help we provide is relief. So in other words, in many cases, we provide relief where there is a need for development, thus causing more harm than good.

Another key thing to know when working with a developing country is understanding Asset-Based verses Needs-Based.

Asset Based focuses on solutions and resources of the people and bringing in outside resources only when appropriate.

Needs-Based is when the solutions and resources come from outside the community. Thus, causing a dependency.

Avoid paternalism, which is "habitually providing resources or assuming tasks a person can provide or do for themselves.

The best way to approach someones needs or the needs of a developing community is to start with taking inventory of their assets. Write down all the gifts and abilities the community has to offer. Then instead of working for them, walk the journey with them.

With all of this in mind, Fikkert is not a huge fan of Short Term Missions trips. However, in his book, he does offer a scenario where STM trips with a long term goal or commitment can be effective and necessary. In other words, use STM trips as a vision trip to explore a long term relationship opportunity.

There is so much more I can share about Fikkert's perspective but I think I'll end here for now.

We wrapped up the conference with a concert by Sara Grove - also, a huge highlight of the conference for me. She is just so real and so transparent - one of my all time favorite musicians actually.

That's all for now!!

Mother's Day and Referral Anniversary

2011-05-09T09:39:00.001-05:00

(I'm so behind on blogging that I decided to combine these two events.)

Two years ago, May 4th, we received Samson's referral. Last week we celebrated with injera and Dora Wat, traditional Ethiopian food. It was yummy!

Confession: I bought the injera and it was the best!

My Dora Wat - I don't know if it looks right but it tasted great!

I set the table with traditional Ethiopian decor. Makes me want to go back to Ethiopia!!

Our referral came just days before Mother's Day 2009. It was so surreal. I was the mother of not just three children but now four. I remember being overwhelmed with mixed emotions after knowing my son's story - knowing that neither of his mothers would be spending Mother's Day with him. It really is an overwhelming feeling to think about what could have been.

This Mother's Day the kids each presented a gift and/or card to me.

Olivia designed my card into a creative game, an origami kind of thing, that when you open it up reveals words of how much she loves me as her mother.

Avery made a picture frame out of noodles with an adorable picture of her on the play ground at school. Her card also expressed her love for me.

Lauren wrote a very nice card to me expressing her love and what she likes most about me.

I would love to share all of these but by the request of my daughter's I am keeping them to myself.

Samson actually presented his gift first. It was in a small white paper bag decorated with puffy stickers on the outside. Inside was pink tissue and this:

On one side is his hand print

On the other side, he drew a red heart, wrote 'LOVE' in yellow, a sun in brown, 'MOMMY' in brown and a picture of me in black. Isn't it beautiful?!

When I pulled out the pot holder and saw his hand print, I had to fight back tears thinking if only his Ethiopian mommy could see his hand print. Why am I so lucky to be the one who receives this gift? Filled with much guilt and mixed emotions of joy and sadness, I retreated to my bedroom upstairs for a good cry. Celebrating Mother's Day is just too overwhelming still. I am overly blessed and undeserving of this.

Wednesday morning Steve and I fly to Kentucky for the Summit. We are so excited for some time away and look forward to networking with others and advocating for orphans around the world. Please keep us in your prayers. I'm hoping to blog about our experiences from Kentucky!

"When were the sisters adopted?"

2011-05-03T10:31:00.001-05:00

When Samson talks about his sisters, he refers to them as "the sisters".

The other night when I was putting him to bed, we were talking about the day we met him. He has all kinds of questions about how we became family.

During this conversation, he asked me, "Mommy, when were the sisters adopted?"

I paused and really thought about how to respond. On one hand, I felt sad that he has to be the one not born from my tummy. So much about adoption is about loss, pain, guilt. How do I explain that he is the only one adopted, yet help him discover the beauty of adoption.

Several months ago, when we talked about how he was born in his Ethiopian mommy's tummy, he said, "No, Avery was born in her Ethiopian mommy's tummy." "I was born in YOUR tummy!"

So, you see, this topic has caused some pain for him. He doesn't want to be the different one.

So when he asked when the sisters were adopted, my first thought was this conversation is going to lead to more pain and more grieving.

But I kept thinking positive, thinking about the beautiful side of adoption, specifically, our adoption into Christ's family.

I didn't have to tell him that his sisters were not adopted. And really they weren't adopted in the same sense that he was adopted.

I told him that at this time it doesn't really matter when his sisters were adopted, so much as it matters that they were adopted.

Yes - they have been adopted! Each of my girls have claimed Christ as their Father. They may not fully understand the benefits and the glory that surrounds their adoption but they have each been adopted by Christ.

Samson may not fully understand his adoption into our family either but some day it will make more sense to him. I pray also that some day he has a greater understanding of the Big picture of being adopted by his heavenly Father and all the glory that surrounds our adoptions into His family.

Chalk creations and wedding dress!

2011-04-26T08:54:00.000-05:00

The kids were off school yesterday for Easter break and temperatures were in the 60s!!

So, we spent every moment possible keeping busy with outdoor activities.

Olivia and Avery prepared us a picnic lunch:

Followed by some fun on the swings:

Between shooting hoops, throwing the football, a short bike ride and jumping on the trampoline, we managed to fill our entire driveway with these beautiful chalk creations. Most of these are Olivia's drawings. I like them all, which made it hard to decide which ones to share. Here are just a few:

Recently, the girls have been begging me to show them my wedding dress. I have shown it to them maybe twice before and last night this seemed like the perfect way to end our day. For the first time, each girl got to model my dress and veil. Don't they make beautiful brides?!!

Overall, it was a fun day had by all!

Aging out of the system and an URGENT request!

2011-04-22T12:46:00.001-05:00

One thing that pulls at my heart more than the stories of those waiting in an orphanage for their forever family are the stories of precious beautiful children who age out of the orphanage and are out on their own. Many times there is no where for these orphans to go and many times they end up swept up into the slave trade.

One thing that God has put on my heart is to advocate against human trafficking. There are three areas of human trafficking we can serve to make a difference: Prevention, Rescue and After Care.

Today I'm advocating for prevention. There is one girl in particular that I'm advocating for and her name is Elange. She is a beautiful, bright girl who lives in an orphanage in Haiti. Elange has watched other children at the orphanage matched and united with their forever families. As weeks and years have passed by, she sees the hope of having a family of her own diminish more each day.

Elange dreams of becoming a doctor some day. But what she wants more than anything is a forever family. Without a family, both her top wishes will not be possible.

In recent days her chances of ever having a mom and/or dad has become dangerously close to reality.

If not matched soon with a family, she will be released from her orphanage and she will become yet another target of human trafficking.

If you are paper ready or you know someone paper ready and interested in Haitian adoption, PLEASE go here and learn more. Remember that time is running out so we need to act quickly to save Elange!

The 3 Little Pigs

2011-04-20T14:17:00.002-05:00

This is Samson's favorite book. He loves to "read" it to me. He knows the story, word for word. In our version, there is a pig that builds his house out of straw, one of his brothers builds his house out of sticks and the third little pig builds his out of bricks.

Yesterday we were driving to pick his sisters up from school and we passed a business that has log siding and Samson says, "Mommy, that house will not last long."

I said, "Why not?"

Samson said, "Because it's made out of sticks."

My Baby Girl is Eight!

2011-04-15T00:33:00.002-05:00

Eight years ago today, our precious Avery June came into this world.

She is named after her great grandma, June, who is 90 years old. We call her Avery June Bugs. She is incredibly sweet and always ready for a hug and a great snuggler.

Avery continues to love gymnastics. Earlier this week, she gave herself a fat lip twirling too fast around the bars on the school play ground. Poor little thing...her lip was the size of a large marble.

She has mastered may stunts in gymnastics, most of which I don't know the proper names for but what she is most known for is her head stand. Almost every class period, she can stand on her head longer than anyone else in her class. She can do splits in the air, bend her knees, move in a circle, among other things, all while standing on her head.

When Olivia asked her what she wanted for her birthday, Avery told her to "Figure it out for yourself! You should know me well enough by now!"

She may be small and petite but she can be a spitfire and she is not afraid to let you know what she thinks!

She loves giving us gifts on our birthdays. If she thinks of something she wants to get one of her sisters, she just tells me to buy it for them and then she wraps it. Sometimes she is very economical and finds treasures around the house to give as gifts.

This past year just before Lauren's birthday, she asked me to hand her a little vase with a tiny flower in it from the kitchen window. I gave it to her and the next day on Lauren's birthday, Lauren unwrapped this tiny vase, which was placed on it's side in a small box - flower and water included. The cuteness and thoughtfulness of it brought tears to my eyes.

Then for Steve's birthday, she wrapped up a set of his golf balls and tees. Too precious!

Avery is very much a "go with the flow" kind of person. She is so easy to please. She shares a room with her brother and doesn't ever complain about having to share this space with him. May times when I wake her for school in the morning, I find her brother sleeping in bed with her, practically smothering her. She explains that when she hears Samson wake up and call for us, she tells him to jump in bed with her so he doesn't wake us up.

She is my girly girl. She loves to have on nail polish and something in her hair almost all the time. She will brush and brush her hair each morning before school and then on her way out, she pops a clip or barrette in at the last minute, not caring if it goes with her outfit or not.

When we are all gathered in the kitchen, Avery is almost always sitting up on the counter. She even does her homework sitting on the center island!

I love her dearly! I am so lucky and privileged to raise her as my daughter!

Look how our June Bugs has grown over the years!:

Last Chance!

2011-04-13T14:00:00.001-05:00

We are selling out on ALL inventory of the current Drawn From Water T-shirts! Hurry over to our store for your last chance to purchase this special shirt for $15!

(Please note: we are limited on some sizes.)

If you have been following the Drawn From Water blog in recent weeks, you know about all the changes they are experiencing. New exciting opportunities are on the horizon for this team as they continue to serve in Ethiopia. Please continue to PRAY and follow their story. Look for new changes to their website and new store items coming soon!

Hard Lessons to Learn

2011-04-12T13:21:00.001-05:00

Some of the toughest lessons for me to learn are lessons from situations when God reminds me that "IT IS NOT ABOUT ME".

Yesterday, I had a situation that caused me to come unglued. I had been planning a special celebration for Avery's birthday this weekend for the past 2 months. I made arrangements way in advance. I confirmed everything not once, not twice but three times. I arranged for family to come from out of town. I made Avery's invites for the girls in her class. I received RSVPs from parents expressing how excited their girls were about the celebration.

Then yesterday morning, I went to sign a form and make a payment and that is when I found out that there was a mix up in the schedule and there was no reservation for Avery's party. Another party was in the slot that I had reserved and confirmed 3 times!

I became angry! How could this happen???!!! This was suppose to be something very special, something I had been planning the details for the past 2 months!!

I am embarrassed to admit that I let someone have it. I expressed my disappointment without holding back. And then if that wasn't hard enough on this poor person on the receiving end of my frustration, I went home, called this person and let them have a few more of my words.

I had a very good argument. I fought for that spot back because that was our spot and the other family should be bumped. Why us??

I eventually lost the fight and I had to make phone calls and new arrangements and I made sure the person on the other end knew the inconvenience she was putting me through.

During the heat of the moments, I thought for just maybe a few seconds about how wrong I was to treat someone like I did but that thought did not stop me. I did it anyway.

Then Steve reminded me of the sermon we watched TV just the night before about how it's "NOT ABOUT ME". The pastor preached about how people make mistakes and that's just part of life.

Well, the situation I was faced with yesterday became all about ME. It was "I this" and "I that" or "this has put ME out" or "poor ME", all because someone made a mistake.

I will be making an apology this evening. It will not be easy to take back all I said and move on but I know it's the right thing to do, so I will.

On another note, but along the same theme, I find myself getting all wrapped up in "It's all about me" as I work towards my attachment with Samson.

We have had several weeks that have gone well. He has let go a lot and shown more trust in me. The more relaxed he becomes and the more he allows me to do for him, the better our attachment feels.

In recent days, I have had flashbacks of how it felt when Samson was first home. I hate this feeling and I want to go back to the way things were just a few days ago.

We have been back and forth before so I have faith that he will come around again. But in the meantime, I like to mope and walk around feeling sorry for myself.

After a couple frustrating days, it just hit me yesterday that I am thinking more about how this is affecting me and less about why he is pulling back in the first place.

Over the weekend, we visited a close relative who brought out several folders of pictures of the girls. Each of our girls had at least 2 folders with oodles of photos. Samson had one folder with very few photos.

Samson is no dummy. He demanded to know where all his baby pictures were. We have had this discussion before and each time he continues to press us for more information. He wants his baby pictures!

The topic of baby pictures seems to touch him to the core. At first I was angry with this relative for bringing all these pictures out. Each time Samson grieves over a loss, he takes it out on me. It's my fault. After all, he has let down his guard and trusted me for several months and now I've let him down.

This is what triggered the "setback" in our attachment. The past couple days he has not let me do things for him. He won't even let me put his diaper on at bedtime or get him dressed.

I was angry. But while I was calling out to the Lord for help, I remembered why Samson is responding in this way. He is grieving. Seeing pictures of his sisters and not of himself is his way of grieving a loss. And then I wasn't so angry at my relative anymore because actually these things needs to surface and be talked about and grieved over. Grieving is healthy. It's just not fun for us on the receiving end.

I just need to remain patient, have faith and pray that some day he will learn to trust me again. And before I go to that place of feeling sorry for myself, I need reminders that it's not about ME!

It's really about Jesus. He will heal, restore and will always know what's best for us.

Father-Daughters; Mother-Son Dates

2011-04-10T17:08:00.000-05:00

Friday night Olivia and Avery attended the Father - Daughter Dance at the girls' school.

Painting their nails

Applying makeup

"How do I look?"

Princesses!

Earlier in the week, Samson asked if there was a "Mamma and Son" dance, which there is not. He was feeling a little left out, so the two of us got all dressed up and went to a play! I had the most handsome date at the theatre Friday night!

Marriage

2011-04-05T10:57:00.002-05:00

Over the past several weeks, Samson has asked and talked a lot about marriage.

He wants to get married. At one time he said that when he gets bigger, he wants to marry me!

Since explaining to him that he can't marry me because I am his mom and I'm already married and you can't marry married people, he continues to talk about the woman he will marry some day.

Just yesterday he said he was going to "take that woman to a store that sells rings and ask her to marry" him. Then he said after they get married, he is going to buy them a house to live in, some bikes to ride, a car, a boat and 2 garages.

He has asked many times if we know who he will be marrying. We've explained to him that he will not know until he is much older. He seems a little impatient not knowing.

Lately, I have been teaching him how to take care of a woman, how to teach her with respect and kindness at all times and never make a woman wait but to treat her like a princess. Once he said, "Well if I treat her like a princess, then I'm a King, right mommy?"

Last week I did something with my back. I told him that he would have to take care of me --- hold my hand when we cross the street, open the doors for me, rub my back. He did it all! He is such a gentleman.

One time when he asked Steve who he will marry, Steve asked him what he wants his wife's name to be.

He said, "I want my wife to be woman."

He has come home from school with a drawing from a female classmate of his. The drawing was a picture of the two of them together. When we leave school, there are several girls who call out to him and say good-bye. He is very social. The kids all know him and seem to like him.

Yesterday we started a new session for gymnastics. There are only 4 kids and he is the only boy. After class he came up to me, grabbed my head and turned it to face one of the little girls.

He said, "Mommy, that little girl's name is Ruby." Then he blushed more than I've ever seen him blush - his dimples were so pronounced by his blush I bet he could have held a dime in them.

I had to confirm with the mother that her name really was "Ruby". A few months ago, I shared this story and never thought I would actually ever meet a little girl named "Ruby".

Last night, I shared the story with our family and Samson blushed again. I said, "Oh no! Do you have a crush on Ruby?" He shook his head "YES!"

Up until this point, his sisters like to tease him about different girls but he has always assured us that they are all just friends. But now he seems smitten! Is this possible?? Now I'm a little worried!

Really, the amazing part of this story is that he met a girl named 'Ruby'. And of all the girls that he attracts through his charming personality, he seems to really like this Ruby.

The interesting thing about this is that even though Olivia had the same thoughts about adopting a girl named Ruby and even though we have discussed this openly, I really don't think Samson has been paying all that much attention to these discussions. I don't know if he even realizes that we have talked about the name Ruby before.

What I do know is that who ever God has chosen as Samson's future wife will be one lucky girl. For now, I pray that God will give us the parenting skills we need to raise him as a respectful, kind and Godly young man.

My heart is melting

2011-03-23T09:10:00.000-05:00

I put Samson down for bed about 99% of the time. Our bedtime routines are some of the most sweetest mother-son moments we have together. Hardly ever does he put up a fight when it's bedtime because I think he simply loves this special alone time with me. This alone melts my heart.

Last night after we read 3 books together, (I say together because there are some favorites that I have read over and over and now he "reads" them to me.) I turned out the light and laid down next to him, like always.

I was laying quite close but not close enough because he said, "Scootch over mommy so I can put my arm around you."

Well, this was by far the most heart melting moment I've ever had with him. In recent months, he has shown us so much of his gentle side.

So, I asked him to repeat what he said and he said again, "scootch over mommy so I can put my arm around you."

Fighting back tears, I said, "Oh Samson, that just made my heart melt!"

Then I scootched over close and he wrapped his arm tight around my neck!

This morning the first thing he asked me was, "Mommy is your heart back together?"
I said, "Huh? What?"

He said, "Well, you told me last night that your heart was melting and I was wondering if it is back together yet?"

My heart just melted again as I looked into his innocent big brown eyes.

If he keeps pouring all this sweetness on me, I don't know if my heart will ever be back together!

On top of all his sweetness, Samson is quite a charmer. And he talks a lot about what kind of family he will have when he is "bigger". He wants to get married and be a daddy. At one time, he said that he wants to marry ME when he gets bigger. >> But Steve broke the news to him that he can't marry a married woman. So, now he talks about marrying someone who is not married. So glad he gets this!

The other interesting thing is that he is pretty sure he wants a big family - lots and lots of kids. He actually wants 10 kids. Oh and when he is a daddy, he will let his kids do things that we don't let him do now.

Yesterday I had his parent/teacher conference. I think I mentioned before that he is the youngest in his preschool class by about 5 months. I came home from this conference the proudest mommy on earth! His teacher told me that he has become very social, plays well with all the kids, is doing things way beyond his age level, is well behaved, polite and......he is a leader!! In a class where all the other 17 kids are 5 months to 1 1/2 years older than him, he is a natural born leader! Just had to share!! Can't wait to see what God has in store for Samson!

My heart is not only melting but gushing with love for this boy!

Please Pray for DFW Orphanage!

2011-03-19T10:54:00.000-05:00

Since before we travelled to Ethiopia, our family has felt a connection to the Drawn From Water organization. Since our trip, we have been involved in raising awareness for this incredible organization. I wrote about how we have been involved here.

Now the unthinkable is happening and they need our prayers. Please read their recent blog posts. It's a little unclear of what is happening for sure but it appears like Levi and Jessie and the others who have made many sacrifices to rescue and care for the now 30 children at the orphanage may not be able to care for them anymore. This news is so disheartening and shocking.

We also sponsor a child through DFW. Her name is Kero and she is the oldest girl at the orphanage. It has been an amazing experience and privilege to support Kero over the past few months. With the current news, it sounds like we may not be able to support her anymore. This alone would be a huge loss for our family. It's all so very sad!!

Please, join me in prayer over this whole situation!

What is the answer?

2011-03-16T09:18:00.002-05:00

Most of you know about or at least have heard about the changes going on in Ethiopian adoptions. There have been many concerns and conversations regarding the ethics surrounding Ethiopian adoptions.

I have read stories about children being trafficked for adoption. I have also read stories about birth parents being coerced into giving up their child for adoption. I don't disbelieve that this is happening or has happened.

This is very tragic! For the agencies who are practicing unethical adoptions, they need to be taken care of swiftly and severely disciplined for their actions.

Trafficking is something that I have studied a lot about in recent months. I have become an advocate against trafficking. I think a lot of my interest in trafficking spurs from the fact that I know a girl who has been rescued from domestic slavery. I also know of a situation where a six year old girl is about to be rescued.

1.2 million more children each year are swept up into child slavery.

The story of the two girls I know about is a very common situation that happens all over the world but especially in developing countries. Families become too poor to provide basic needs for their children. They become desperate especially when there is not a safe place for them to take them for help. (They don't have social services like they have in the US). In the case of the two children I know of, the local orphanages are full and relatives are too stretched with taking care of their own families to care for another child.

The only option left is for a parent to either abandon their child or sell them to another family. They use the money to provide for the rest of their family until they have to sell another child. Can you even imagine being faced with the decision of which child to sell?

Many of these children are resold into the sex slave. Or once they become someones domestic slave, they are most of the time treated as less than human.

As the case with the two that I know, they do all the cooking, cleaning, receive very little food, forbidden to attend school and are beaten on a daily basis. These girls are 11 and 6!

I am all for "cleaning up the system", more thorough investigations, more scrutiny on adoption cases but I've also seen first hand what happens to kids without a presence of safe help for the parents. This is also tragic!

There are legitimate cases of kids needing families. I have several friends who are in the process of adopting from Ethiopia. One family is adopting older children who have been in an orphanage for around 3 years. One family is adopting older toddlers off a waiting list who are approaching 1 year in an orphanage. Another family has been waiting for over 2 years for a referral. All of these families want to provide a family for a child in need. They are all for ethically adoptions but will now experience a major delay in bringing their kids home.

Is slowing down adoptions the answer? This has been highly debated.

Are we doing more harm by slowing them down? Time will tell.

I hate human trafficking. There are a couple things that keep me awake at night. One is the thought of a 6 year old working as someones domestic slave, being treated like an animal and beaten over and over. In addition, I don't like how adoption has caused children to be trafficked for adoption.

The other thing that keeps me awake at night are the older child orphans, praying each night for a family of their own. I read a blog post just last night that will forever haunt me. It described a girl in an orphanage in Ethiopia who has watched her friends being adopted into families and she has been seen crying in the background of home videos and pictures. When asked why she is crying, she says more than anything else, she wants a family and she is afraid that she may never have one.

Now that adoptions are slowing down in Ethiopia, the hope for this beautiful girl to receive her forever family diminishes. She is also close to aging out the system. And once she ages out of the system, she is a huge target for human trafficking.

Do you think that by slowing down adoptions, there may be more trafficking? Time will tell.

This is an extremely complicated issue. It seems like there is a greater issue going on here. As one article I have read has suggested, do we even have the right diagnoses? What should we really be going after? What really needs to be fixed here?

I say I'm an advocate against human trafficking. Have I done all I can to prevent human trafficking? NO! There are others on the field literally rescuing children from slavery - they are doing so much more than me. There is no way I can say I've done everything I can. Human trafficking is a mountain that needs to be moved, so there is no way I can move this mountain on my own. But I want to do more - I really do.

I am praying about more potential opportunities to come along side efforts to aggressively fight against this injustice. I will keep you posted.

Truly Inspiring Story

2011-03-08T13:10:00.000-06:00

Yesterday if you had a chance to watch the Today show, you may have seen the truly inspiring story of the Twietmeyer family and their special interest in adopting kids with hiv.

Since their adoptions of 6 children from Ethiopia, 2 with hiv, they have launched a non profit organization called Project Hopeful and now come along side other families through their adoptions of children with hiv.

I watched this segment on the Today show and was so moved by their story that I cried.

This is not the first time the Twietmeyer's have made national news with their story. They have been in People magazine and interviewed on other larger networks as well.

This time, Jenna Bush has conducted the interview and she is just as passionate about educating others on hiv as the Twietmeyer family. I'm excited for the Twietmeyers to have an advocate like Jenna to come along side them.

Check out the news segment here!

I didn't know much about Project Hopeful until just recently. I have a friend who lives in Haiti and just put money down on a home which she will use to care for up to 7 children with hiv. God has placed on her heart to educate the Haitian people and to lower the stigma that surrounds this chronic disease. When I learned about her plans to advocate for orphans in this way, I told another friend, Andrea about her not even remembering that Andrea works with Project Hopeful.

Well, Project Hopeful was looking for someone like my friend Rhyan to be their main contact in Haiti. It was a perfect match. They are truly meant to be partners in this endeavor.

Please visit Rhyan's blog and consider helping her out. The sooner she can raise the money, the sooner she can fill her new home with beautiful children and provide them with hope for a brighter future.

As Jenna stated in the Today show interview, hiv is not a death sentence. It is a chronic disease that can be controlled with medication, just like other chronic diseases like diabetes. I think most people don't realize this. Just a couple years ago, I myself had misconceptions about this disease. And I'm still learning.

Fighting injustice

2011-03-07T13:21:00.003-06:00

I have not written much on my blog about the things that God has put in my path recently. On top of all the winter blues and junk that comes with a very long winter, I have been blessed with "projects" that require spending time networking, defending and advocating.

It's all exhausting. It's hard work. It's mentally and emotionally draining. But the rewards are worth the time and energy.
Sometimes I find my self apologizing for being so passionate. But once my eyes have seen, I cannot turn the other way because I know God will hold me accountable for what I have seen and what I know.

I know there are things I have ignored in the past because for one, it's easy to judge. As long as I can make a judgement on a situation, I can rationalize not doing anything about it.

Well, now, I am passionate about doing something about it. And it is not my place to judge. After all, I trust God knows what He is doing.

There have been times of discouragement along this journey. This is the hard part because whenever I feel discouraged, I also think about how easy it would be to give up hope and question why I have joined this fight in the first place.

Recently a very wise friend reminded me that if we fight for what is right, there is less of a chance for Satan to win. But if we walk away from needs that God has shown us, Satan will for sure win.
Then Saturday night I had the opportunity to talk at length on the phone with a dear friend that I met on-line and who lives many states away. I am blessed to have like-minded people like her in my life just to stay encouraged. It was so refreshing to talk to her because she gets it! This godly friend of mine who has also worked hard over the years fighting against injustice, reminded me why people give up.

We talked about how people can walk away but then need a justification, so they turn to judging the situation to make them feel better. I have been in this place before. Now I'm in a different place.

And yet another friend strong in her faith, who knows the details of my battle and the depth of my weariness, reminded me that no matter what, I'm not alone.

Just a couple hours later, I had a major break through. Something very cool evolved and I hope to share it all some day. But for now, please pray for me this week. On Friday I have the opportunity to present the situations and ask for help from an oganization that may be able to help.

I know there are a lot of needs in our world but God picked these few to break my heart and cause me to get involved.

After several rejections and discouraging moments, there is someone out there who wants to hear more and help. God is so cool! He is so GOOD!

This morning, Samson got up and came into my bed to cuddle with me. He has watched me over the past few days. I think he knows how I have felt beaten down and discouraged. So, with his arms wrapped tightly around my neck, he said to me, "Mommy, don't be afraid because God is with you." Then he said, "and I will protect you from lions."

I immediately thought of the scripture that describes Satan as a lion prowling over us. Hmmm. What a wise little boy.

There is much we can learn from the confidence and faith of a small child.

This morning, I have a better outlook and more strength to go out there and fight. It's a great feeling!

Would you please pray?!!

- Pray for the safety and welfare of a pastor, his wife and family and 12 orphans who are in a desperate situation.
- Pray for two more dear friends of mine who have given their lives to serve the least of these somewhere else in our world and who God used to bring these needs to my attention.
- Pray that help is on it's way!
- Pray that God will give me the right words to plead their case to an organization who is open to learning more.

Have I said that I'm sick of winter?!!

2011-03-04T21:20:00.000-06:00

My life is full!! I love my family and the joys that come with a family!
However, lately, I have been so done with winter and illnesses! I have lost track of who was sick with what and when but it seemed like we had been sick for over 3 weeks. In fact, Avery came down with the stomach flu early this week for the second time in 10 days!

One day last week, right after I made the decision to keep one daughter home because of a warm forehead, I loaded the rest of the kids in the van to bring to school, set my coffee down and my cell phone slipped into my coffee.

I quickly retrieved my phone, wiped it off and it was dead. Holding back tears as I proceeded to back out of the garage, I hooked my side view mirror on the van.

The other day, I heard Avery screaming in pain from behind a bathroom door. I let Coco down to run to check on Avery who was leaning over the toilet vomiting. I had just finished cleaning up her vomit from our bathroom floor when I returned to find Coco went potty on my kitchen rug.

After cleaning up Coco's mess and getting Avery settled on the couch with a pillow, blanket and a puke bucket, I realized that I still had to take the other kids to school that morning.

So, I went to the bottom of the stairs to yell for Laurena and Olivia and only then remembered that I had lost my voice. I was without or barley with a voice for about 5 days.

I helped them gather their items, fill their back packs, get water bottles ready....we were almost out the door and I remembered Samson. Where was Samson? For a few moments, while I was distracted with cleaning up messes, I forgot about Samson.

I ran upstairs and found him comfortably laying on my bed watching cartoons.

Now, this is very unusual, because Samson hardly ever stays by himself in a room. In fact, most mornings, he is running along side me and never leaves my side. Plus it's a mystery how he managed to turn the TV and get to the right channel on his own. (we haven't shown him how yet)

I scooped him up, threw his coat and boots on and brought him to the car. And, well, let's just say that Samson doesn't do well with quick transitions. Must I say more??

I managed to deliver both healthy girls to school on time that particular morning.

At last, back home with my 4 year old son. First, clean up breakfast dishes, feed and play with Coco, throw another load in the wash and off to think of creative activities for Samson and I to do together.

Sometimes we read books, play with puzzles or Legos. But most of the time, we play things that require more physical movement, like chasing each other around the house, hitting a balloon back and forth or passing the football.

By the time we have to leave to pick up the girls from school, I'm ready to take a nap. But when you have a teenager, napping after school is not an option.

Also, when you have a teenager, you do not want to be without a cell phone. The day my cell phone was taking a rice bath, was a day that I probably most needed it ever. Explaining my day without my cell phone would be a whole other post, so I'll save you the details. But trust me, it was not fun at all!!

Sometimes I crave adult conversation. I love gathering with girlfriends and chatting about spiritual stuff. Not that playing with Samson doesn't stimulate my brain enough because actually, having a conversation with him really does make me think...

Especially when he asks questions like, "Mommy, how do you make black and turn it into glasses?"or
"What if a cloud started talking to you?" "What if a cloud talked funny?"

I mean you really have to think when you answer these types of questions especially when you're feeling a little under the weather and not really wanting to think too much.

Speaking of feeling under the weather....why is it that you seem to hit your busiest times when you are not feeling well?

Laying my head on the pillow each night has become the best feeling ever to me.

Don't mean to sound like a downer and I know much has to do with the cold and long winter we have had and all the crud that comes during this season but boy am I ready for a change of weather!!

I now have a 15 year old!

2011-02-28T09:17:00.001-06:00

Lauren turned 15!!

Yesterday, February 27th was her date of birth, born in 1996.

Tonight she starts driver's training!

Oh my goodness, how did this happen???!!!

It was just yesterday when she was wearing her princess crown and gold glittered shoes.

At age 4 she begged and begged to play the violin. We finally gave in to her plead at age 6 and she has been very passionate about the violin since then. A couple weeks ago, she was chosen to play the first violin part in our state's mid level orchestra. She was one of 32 violinist out of 800 who auditioned chosen for this special honor.

She has always been a special big sister to her younger siblings. They look up to her and admire her.

She loves family time together.

Lauren and Olivia preparing family devotions:

A heated game of pictionary with the girls against Steve and I:

Lauren giving Samson swimming lessons:

Lauren also likes to spend time with her friends. In fact, she shares so much in common with her best friend since Kindergarten that the local newspaper did a write up about the two girls:

The coolest thing they have in common is that they share the same birthday.

Not only that but they were born at the same hospital 1/2 hour apart from each other. Big deal right?

Well, what if I told you that they were born in a hospital 2 1/2 hours from where we live now and each of our families moved to our current community 5 years apart from each other.

We moved here first and enrolled Lauren in preschool at a small private school in town. The next year, her best friend's family moved to town and the girls started Kindergarten together at the same small private school.

As the years went by, we discovered that prior to moving, our families lived within 1 mile of each other.

And the coincidences don't stop there...

We drove the exact same van, same model, same color.

We had the exact same camera.

The girls went through 6th grade together at this school and finished #1 and #2 in the class.

and the list goes on...

Today, as freshman's in high school, they still consider each other to be their best friend.

This school year Lauren participated in Tennis and was on the Nordic Ski team:

The girl's ski team earned gold honors for academics this year. Together, they averaged a 3.96 grade point gpa! Isn't that unbelievable???!! Simply amazing!!

We are so proud of you Lauren, all that you have accomplished and the beautiful young woman you have become.

Continue using your gifts to bring glory to Him. Let His light shine through you. Look for opportunities to further His Kingdom. Take the high road in life and strive to be the unique person God has made you to be.

You are dearly loved by your family.

But don't forget that God loves you even more!!

A blessing after experiencing loss

2011-02-22T10:17:00.000-06:00

When we were waiting for the referral of Samson, we received the referral of another beautiful boy. I briefly wrote about this experience once but today I want to share what has transpired from this experience and how this sweet boy continues to be part of our lives.

By far the most difficult part of our journey to Samson was discovering that the boy first referred to our family was not our son after all. We received the referral, we celebrated and claimed this beautiful child as our son. Then as the days went by, our instincts were telling us that we needed to let this child go, that he was meant for another family.

Breaking the news to our girls was the hardest. It was one of the most difficult days of my life. We all held each other that day and wept.

Several months before this referral I had a dream and God told me in this dream that our son's birthday would be in February. This particular child's birthday was not in February. But this is not why we let go of the referral. There were other factors and our gut feeling that led to this decision.

Several weeks passed, we were still grieving the loss of our first referral and with mixed emotions we received the referral of Samson.

At first it seemed unfair to the first child to move on and focus on another child. But as soon as we pulled up Samson's picture, we knew without a doubt that he was our son. His birthday? February 11th. But that's not why we accepted the referral of Samson. It was more than the confirmation of his birthday, it was how he looked like our family! He had Olivia's dimples, a round face and of course Steve's brown eyes! How do you put into words how we just knew he was the one?!

And since he has joined our family, I can't tell you how often we have gotten the comment from others about how much he fits into our family.

Soon after we turned down our first referral, we heard from our agency that he had been matched with another family. We were told that his family would be picking him up in July.

We prayed that they would find a family for this beautiful boy soon, so this was very good news. We continued to pray that God landed this precious boy in the perfect family.

As we prepared for our trip to Ethiopia, I had a strange feeling that this boy would still be in the orphanage even though our family travelled in August. So, Steve and I prepared our girls for the possibility of meeting him there.

Well, my feelings became reality when one of the first toddler boys we saw at the orphanage was this boy. We learned that he would be going home with his family very soon. At the time, we knew there had to be a reason why he was still there and a reason why God brought him into our lives in the first place.

When we visited the orphanage to spend time with Samson, we played with this sweet toddler as well. We held him, gave him hugs and lavished love on him. He was so sweet. There were times when Samson was too scared to come anywhere near our family but this sweet boy was always ready to receive love from us. In fact, many times he pulled on Steve's pant legs wanting to be held.

This is why I believe he entered our lives in the first place. God used our family to pray for him and love on him at the orpahange. There was a unexplainable bond between him and our family.

To be honest, there was a time that we wondered if we had made a mistake.

Then by a miracle, through Internet connections, we have been able to connect with his new family and communicate back and forth since he joined them.

We have been blessed with updates and pictures and the ability to watch an amazing transformation come over this beautiful child.

And the coolest thing about this whole story is that he is a perfect fit for his family.

Equally as cool, Samson is the perfect fit for our family.

I share this because I know there are other families who have struggled with a similar decision. Out of obedience we let him go, praying that God had a perfect family chosen for him. As difficult as it was to let go, we prayed hard, we knew we had to go with our gut and we left the rest to the Lord. He makes all things beautiful in time.

We are blessed!

Blogging Friends

2011-02-20T15:19:00.005-06:00

I have been so blessed by this special group of friends, most of whom I have never met in person. The more time I spend in the blogging world, the more it becomes a small world to me, making this network of friends extra special. Blogging has provided an unique way to build relationships and share life experiences with other women.

Andrea is one of my blogging friends who has inspired me greatly through her blog over the past few years. I admire her for her strong faith and obedience to God. I also love her zeal to help the 'least of these'. Although, I have never met Andrea in person, I have grown to love her compassionate heart.

Recently, Andrea and I have been able to, through our connections, see God at work in pretty amazing ways! What a blessing it has been to experience so much with someone I hope to meet some day.

Andrea is very sweet! She nominated my blog for the "Irresistibly Sweet Blog Award".

So, the rules for this is that I first have to list five guilty pleasures...

I love licorice!
I love Skittles (YES - I LOVE sugar!!)
I love taking bubble baths while listening to Pandora! - it's my escape from the kids.
I love drinking coffee ALL day!
I love to sit up and read a good book late at night!

Now, it's my turn to nominate other sweet blogs that I follow.

First, I would have nominated my friend Cindy's blog but Andrea already nominated her. Still, I wanted to share that Cindy is one of my on-line friends that I have had the pleasure of meeting. We met about a year ago at the Summit in Minneapolis. Recently, our family and Cindy's have been living very parallel lives. We each are struggling with something very similar and instead of feeling alone in the world with this struggle, we have been able to lean on each other. For this reason, I so love the Internet, that it provides the ability to connect with someone at this level so that we can offer each other support without having to connect in person.

And, here are other blogs you must check out:

Bonnie's: I have never met Bonnie in person but she has been an enormous support for me through my attachment journey with Samson.

Nikki's: I first met Nikki through our agency's on-line forum. Soon after, we discovered that she was soon to be neighbors to my parents, so Nikki is one of my on-line friends that I have been fortunate enough to meet in person. Nikki and her family have been waiting months and months for the referral of their second child, this time from Ethiopia. Nikki is a sweetheart!

Kate's: Kate and Jeff were part of our travel group. Incredibly sweet couple! I continue to be inspired by their strength and faith through their adoption story. So blessed to know this sweet family and to have made the journey to Africa with them.

Rachael's: Rachael and I have been friends for several years. Rachael and her husband Ryan came along side us through our adoption journey and now we have the blessing of watching their adoption story unfold. They are parents to 5 sweet children and will soon be parents to 2 more from Ethiopia!

Shelly's: Shelly is another great friend. Shelly and her husband Scott have been part of our small home church for about a year and it has been an amazing blessing to walk this journey of life together. They have just begun the adoption process, their journey to add another one (or two) to their family.

Deb's: Deb is new to the blogging world. Her blog is smothered with sweetness! She is an amazingly, crafty and clever writer! Deb and I have been great friends for 12+ years.

Hope you enjoy all of these treasures!!

On turning 4!

2011-02-11T00:00:00.009-06:00

We celebrate Samson's Four years of life Today! And his 1 1/2 years of being part of our family!

I don't think I can say enough about what he has done for my life. Through building our relationship, He has taught me patience, forgiveness, endurance and unconditional love. Because of Samson, I am a better person today. Because of Samson, I have seen God at work and felt His presence in my life more than ever.

Some things I have learned about my little Prince:

He is ~~persistent~~ determined.
He is Smart!
He has a beautiful singing voice.
His favorite thing to do is have mommy read to him.
His favorite color is red.
His favorite movie is CARS.
He loves kicking, throwing and hitting balls.
He thinks he is stronger and faster than both Steve and I. We let him think so to boost his confidence.
He is in gymnastic and Kinder Music with mom.
He is 40" tall and weighs 40 pounds.

He is in preschool and is the very youngest by several months. While he is just turning 4, most of the kids in his preschool class are turning 5. The teacher tried dissuading us from sending him but he has more than surprised her with his maturity.

One day he came home with a drawing given to him from a little girl in his class. We teased him and asked if this was his girlfriend.

He said, "No, this is not my girl friend. She is just a girl and we are friends." We were amazed that he even knew the difference!

Still, our girls like to tease him once in a while about this girl or that girl. One day, it must have gotten to be too much for him, however because he began to blush and he asked them to stop because he was feeling kind of "ticklish." That was the best way he could explain his feelings at the moment.

Speaking of being ticklish, we like to tickle him and he loves to be tickled! He also makes us laugh a lot.

When Samson first came home, he would not leave my side. He even stood outside the shower as I showered and always had to have one hand in the shower to make sure I was in there. Now, he still is near by when I shower and many times is waiting for me with a towel.
There are many times he simply makes me smile and proud to be his momma. Like at his preschool program this evening, they were singing a song that said, "I love you" at the end and he pointed right at me.

Or each morning, I hear him skidding down the steps on his bumper at a frightening speed, landing on the floor with a big thud, jumping up, running to me and throwing his arms around me. What makes me smile most about this is that he saves his first hug of the day for me.

The other day, we were driving somewhere in the car and I asked him, rhetorically, "Samson, how is it that I got so lucky to have you as my son?"

Quite matter of fact, he said, "I don't know. You just got lucky I guess."

This conversation led into him saying this: "Mommy, I know whose tummy I came out of."
Me: "Oh yeah? Whose?"
Samson: "I came out of my Ethiopian mommy's tummy."
Me: "Yeah, you're right!"
Me: "What do you remember most about Ethiopia"
Samson: "I remember being in my mommy's tummy and oh boy was that fun."
Me: Hmm

Me: "Do you miss Ethiopia?"
Samson: "Yes, I do."
Me: "Does that make you sad?"

Samson thought for a while and then said something really profound and really beyond his years of maturity.
He said, "No I'm not sad because I know that if I was still in Ethiopia I would be happy. But I'm with you now and I'm happy here too."

At the young age of four, he shows so much courage and strength than a four year old should be expected to show. In the midst of all his pain and confusion, he seems to have found happiness.

Happy Birthday Samson!!

May your life continue to overflow with the blessing of Happiness!

FREE T-Shirt

2011-02-04T08:37:00.000-06:00

Drawn From Water is giving away 20 FREE T-shirts!

Go HERE for the details!

The Third Largest Global Crime

2011-01-26T14:59:00.002-06:00

That was what Human Trafficking was in 2008! The THIRD largest. Today, it is the SECOND largest and by the end of this year, it will be THE largest!

I found this utube video off Tom Davis' blog of Rick Warren interviewing then presidential candidate Barack Obama. He asked Mr. Obama about Human Trafficking and how it is the THIRD largest global crime industry in the world. Mr. Obama's response was that this needs to be a "TOP priority" for the US government. Which is GREAT that he wants to make it a top priority.

But the other point I'm trying to make here is that this interview took place in 2008, less than 3 years ago. During the interview, Mr. Warren mentions that this is the third largest global crime.

So, in less than 3 years, Human Trafficking will grow from #3 to become the LARGEST, the #1 global crime!

I mentioned in my last blog post that orphans are the biggest target of human trafficking.
In most countries, children age out of orphanages at age 15 - 16 years old.

-15% of these orphans commit suicide
-15% to into prostitution

Again, there are 1.2 million children pulled into sex trafficking each year! This is every 2 minutes and 40 times per day a child is lured or forced into this crime industry.

Praying that this is a priority for the US government. And as Tom Davis states on his blog, we need to "greatly hope the President could advance anti-trafficking legislation and policies that both political parties could back and pass into law."

This morning the International Justice Mission (IJM) is applauding President Obama for his words proclaiming January 2011 as anti-trafficking month and his statement: "From every corner of our nation to every part of the globe, we must stand firm in defense of freedom and bear witness for those exploited by modern slavery."

Now the IJM is asking for 25,000 people to sign a petition asking the President to end modern day slavery.
I urge you to please visit the above link and sign this petition. Let's keep this social issue at the TOP of the President's priority list!

The largest global crime

2011-01-24T08:57:00.002-06:00

That's what experts project Human Trafficking to become in the year 2011!

-Human Trafficking is now the Second largest Global Crime next to Drugs!

-Human Trafficking is a 32 billion dollar industry

-25% of the trafficking is from Europe

-Only 1 - 2 percent of those trafficked are rescued.

-1.2 Million are forced into slavery EACH YEAR!

-Orphans are the biggest targets of sex trafficking.

The rapid growth of this industry is frightening! It's not just something happening in a different country either.

Last week, I participated in a Human Trafficking Webinar hosted by Christian Alliance for Orphans and led by Tom Davis, founder of Hopechest. This is where I heard the above statistics. This is when it was confirmed to me the one main thing that fuels this industry -

PORNOGRAPHY!!

Pornography creates an appetite for trafficking.

Those who support the pornography industry, such as strip clubs, websites with porn and play boy magazines, are feeding to the Human Trafficking industry!

Searching on the internet and looking at a play boy magazine in your own private home, may seem like to some very innocent and causing no harm to anyone else.

But the opposite it true!! The more demand there is for pornography, the more sex crazy our culture becomes and the more sex crazy our culture becomes, the more demand there is for pornography, the more we feed into the human trafficking industry.

Pornography is the main business that keeps human trafficking in business!

Furthermore, a lot of pornography features women and children who have been trafficked!

We have a "gentleman's club" in our small community. Each weekend, the parking lot is FULL of cars. During deer hunting season and holidays, the parking lot is overflowing!

My daughter Lauren has driven by there on a bus with teammates or classmates who have pointed at the local strip club and said, "My dad goes there." They offer this information to others like they are sharing which golf club their father's golf at.

I wonder how many clients would still be frequenting the club if they knew that some of those girls were victims of human trafficking.

I walked into a local book store with my 7 year old daughter the other day and up on the back wall in plain sight was a play boy calendar. It was very large and very easy to see upon entering the store. My daughter and I were having some special time together and I was going to let her pick out a book. But we had to leave the store after one foot in the door.

I wonder if the store owner would sell pornography if she knew that some of the girls featured in the magazines were trafficked.

So the question is, what can we do? What actions can we take to change the mind sets of a sex crazy culture.

We can begin by educating, which is the purpose of my blog post today. Educate the public about the affects of pornography and it's direct link to human trafficking.

I was going to list sites here showing the research that has been done to prove that there is a link. But just google the topic and you will find numerous sites.

I have so much more to say on this topic in more blog posts to come.

I Won! and other stuff...

2011-01-23T09:11:00.002-06:00

I entered a raffle that my dear on-line friend Andrea offered on her blog to raise money for their home study and I won a coffee maker!

They are beginning the process to adopt their third child from Ethiopia and this time it's going to be a daughter. They are an amazing adoptive family. God willing, I hope to meet Andrea in person some day. I have been following her blog for a long time now and she is a huge inspiration to me.

God has been doing some really cool things in our lives recently. In fact, Andrea's raffle confirmed something for me in a very unique way. I wish I could tell more but I need to wait a little bit longer before I can share on-line.

In other news, our family was asked to staff the Compassion International (CI) table last night at a Peder Eide concert in town. Peder led the worship at the Summit I attended last spring and I love his music. Peder is a spokesperson for CI and an adoptive parent. This is his adoption story. We share a lot of things in common with Peder, so we had a fun conversation sharing our hearts and life experiences with each other.

Then, remember when I posted a while back about a little girl in Haiti that could use some prayers? I have a friend there who was trying to rescue her from a life of slavery. I had not heard from him for a while, so I was starting to worry.

Yesterday, I finally received an email from him with the day by day account of his life this past week. He was able to successfully rescue her. Praise God!!

However, as soon as she was legally in his custody, he became homeless and struggled for 2 nights until he found a place for them to settle. This was the first of many mountains he needs to climb in the near future. He has very limited resource and he has had a lot of friends turn their backs on him. The conditions are so devastating in Haiti, no one wants to help or get involved because they have enough problems of their own.

Please continue to pray for him and this sweet little girl who now has a better future a head of her but still much to overcome. Pray that God will continue to provide. Pray that God will bring a "mother" into her life very soon - she is approaching puberty. My friend needs to return to the US to take care of some business, so pray that God will provide a safe place for his daughter to stay until he can return. Please pray that God will bring people along side my friend to help out and not judge his decision to save this sweet girl's life.

He travelled to Haiti with plans to help orphanages. But God had other plans for him. The enemy told him, this is just one little girl, why pour all your time and resources into saving just one? But to my friend, she was not just another little girl and he wasn't going to sit and watch her get sold into slavery. To him, this girl was a child of God, here for a purpose, a life different than forced slavery. She now has a better chance at living out what God's purpose is for her life.

The statistics of child slavery are staggering, especially since the earthquake. There have been at least 2000 children sold into slavery in Haiti since the earthquake. Sweet "B" was rescued from becoming a statistic. She may be only one child but she is one less child that will be a victim of this horrible crime. And to my friend, her life was worth fighting for. Praise God for her life!

Please pray for the 1.2 million children around the world who are forced into human trafficking EACH year. I have a lot more to say about human trafficking and ways you can help coming in a blog post very soon.

She Got In!!!

2011-01-12T08:53:00.000-06:00

I think I have shared that my daughter Lauren's biggest passion is the violin. This morning I am crying tears of joy because she just learned that she got into the State Orchestra!!

She tried out in October!! The results just came today, so we have been on pins and needles waiting patiently for the results.

Not only did she get in but she was selected to play 1st violin and will have the 15th chair! I don't know how many violinist actually get in but we have been told that literally hundreds try out.

Thanks for letting me brag....I know God has big plans for her to use this beautiful gift in a very special way!

A Raffle!

2011-01-11T23:22:00.001-06:00

A dear on-line friend of mine has posted a raffle on her blog to raise money for her family's 3rd adoption. She has some very cool items to raffle. For as little as $5, you can have a chance to win! Check it out!
Join in on the fun and help this beautiful family raise the funds they need for their home study!

Under the Same Moon

2011-01-07T08:57:00.000-06:00

While in Haiti, a few of us from our group tried to make arrangements to visit an orphanage in Leogane. We were not able to visit this orphanage but it still remains dear to my heart. The name of the orphanage is All God's Children.

Leogane was the epicenter of the earthquake almost one year ago. Although this orphanage was destroyed during the quake, all children and their nannies miraculously survived. After the earthquake, they continued to live on the orphanage property, without a building and without much food or water until July. All the children and their nannies were struggling to survive, just barely hanging on. Most of them became severely malnourished.

And then All God's Children stepped in to help.

Now they have a new orphanage building and receive at least 2 meals a day.

Then, in November, Leogane became the hardest hit city from the hurricane. During the worst weather, all orphans and nannies evacuated to the roof of the orphanage while the building was flooded by heavy rain storms. They congregated on the roof through the entire night, clinging to each other until the storms subsided by morning.

At the same time, several of the children were in the hospital with cholera symptoms.

Once again, all survived the hurricane and the cholera for now. But they continue to be in much need of our support and encouragement.

So, a good friend of mine designed a T-shirt to raise money for this orphanage. This is a really cool shirt. Go here to find out for yourselves and please consider supporting the least of these through the purchase of one of these amazing shirts.

Our story of giving back

2011-01-03T06:28:00.001-06:00

Today, I am a guest blogger over on Kari Gibson's blog, My Crazy Adoption. If you are interested in the whole story of how it came to be that our family became involved with Drawn From Water, go to Kari's blog.

When it's meant to be

2010-12-31T21:04:00.000-06:00

I believe in things that are meant to be. Sometimes, we can try so hard to have things our way or try to manipulate situations to be in our favor because we know best.

We lost our dog Sasha 5 1/2 years ago. Olivia has been begging for a dog ever since. Steve and I have thought of every excuse under the sun to not get a dog, everything from the dog would ruin our new carpet to we don't have time to take care of a dog.

The biggest reason has been that we didn't think our girls were old enough to take on the responsibility of caring for a dog.

This Christmas, the ONLY thing Olivia wanted for Christmas was a dog. She even mailed a letter to Santa, telling him that he was her last hope for a dog.

It's winter, we have had several inches of snow and we live in a cold climate. Steve and I said we would keep an open mind and think about possibly getting a dog in the spring or summer. Our excuse this time was that a new puppy would be too hard to train in the winter.

Still, Olivia was relentless in her asking.

Two weeks before Christmas, Steve and I went shopping for the kids' Christmas presents. We set out hoping to discover something really cool and fun that would satisfy Olivia and take her mind off a dog for a while.

But we were having no such luck. Anything that was really cool was also really expensive.

During this particular day of shopping, I left Steve in the electronics department and headed to another part of the store. I ran into a friend that I had not seen for several weeks. I told her about our predicament with Olivia only wanting a dog for Christmas and that it was not going to happen.

My friend told me that if we ever consider a dog at some point, we should look into a local poodle breeder, which is where they got their female pup. She explained how this particular breeder breeds poodles that are not yippy, smart and easy to train.

At that moment, my friend's cell phone rang, so we said a quick good bye and I was off to find Steve. Just as I found Steve (still in the electronics department), my friend came running with her cell phone in her hand and pushing her cart.

She said, "you would not believe this!" Then she proceeded to tell us that that was her husband on the phone and he wanted her to know that he just talked to the poodle breeder and she had one puppy for sale - just 4 weeks old. The breeder asked if they knew anyone that wanted a poodle. After breeding poodles for 20 years, this was going to be her last puppy.

After a series of phone calls and conversations, Steve and I miraculously ended up at the breeder's home that same afternoon to look at the puppy.

We agreed that we were just going to look - not fall in love - just look.

We both left there smitten. We told the breeder we would think about it and call her with our decision.

We waited five days, did our research and Steve and I both decided that this was the one. The one thing that sealed the deal for us more than anything is that poodles are the most hypoallergenic breed of dogs. Steve is highly allergic to cats and dogs, so this was very important for us.

On Christmas day, we wanted to surprise the kids. We arranged with the breeder to bring the kids over that morning. We got up, ate breakfast, opened a couple gifts and Steve said he wanted to go for a drive. The kids thought this was a great idea! It was a beautiful day, snow clinging to the evergreens and a light snow fall in the air.

We drove to the breeder's home on the other side of town and Steve turned in the driveway. The kids freaked out! They asked their dad what the heck he was doing just pulling into a stranger's driveway. Steve got out of the truck and said he was going to go ask for some cookies.

The girls got unbuckled and went to the floor because they were embarrassed that their father would walk to a stranger's house and ask for cookies on Christmas day.

Then Steve came back to the car and said that we could all go inside. We practically had to drag our kids out of the truck.

The new puppy was running around on the floor and I said, "Olivia, Merry Christmas!"

There are no words to describe this moment. It was all worth taking the plunge and buying a dog.

Days following, Olivia named our new puppy, "Coco". She is black with a little white on her chest and on a couple paws.

We were not able to take her home with us that day because she still needed to be weened from her mother.

So, today, New Year's Ever, Steve traveled to the other side of town in the truck, through a snow storm, with the three youngest kids to pick up Coco.

She is the most adorable, cuddly dog ever! Our whole family is in love!

Introducing.....Coco!!! It was meant to be!

One little girl could use your prayers

2010-12-30T19:06:00.002-06:00

I have been home from Haiti for 2 months now and still feel just as messed up as I was when I first arrived home. I was only there for a week but experienced enough to impact me the rest of my life.

For the past several years, I have been reading a lot about human trafficking and I have been following organizations advocating against human trafficking. Each time I read another story of a tragedy involving trafficking or a rescue, God gets my attention over any other injustice in the world.

One part of my experience that I will never forget, are the beautiful children of Haiti. There was one little girl in particular that stole the hearts of many in our group. In fact, members of our team left money to buy her a school uniform so she could go to school. She had been wandering the streets on her own until she entered school.

The teacher has relayed glowing reports through a mutual friend to our team back in the US. We have enjoyed seeing pictures of her in her new uniform, smiling and very happy.

Earlier this week, I received a very disturbing email from our contact in Haiti. This girl is in danger of being trafficked.

I can't share details of this story. But I will say that they have haunted me all week. Up until this point, I have read some horrible stories of children being sold into the slave trade. Nothing has shaken me more than this story.

Our contact is doing everything in his power to intervene and to rescue this beautiful child.

In Haiti, there are currently 300,000 children working in the slave industry. 1 out of 10 children in Haiti are working as slaves. Since the earthquake in January, sex trafficking in Haiti has been rampant. Just google any of this and you will find several stories on the Internet to back this up.

These statistics shake me even more now that I can put a name and face to a potential innocent victim to this horrendous crime.

Please pray for little 'B' and her future. Pray that my friend will be able to work through red tape fast enough to rescue her. It's all very complicated. Thank you!!

Christmas 2010

2010-12-29T10:42:00.001-06:00

Grandpa and Grandma and their grandchildren.

Beautiful Olivia

Avery and crazy hair

Great Grandma, great grandchildren and one miniature Santa

Avery opening gifts

Lauren opening something she has wanted for a LONG time.

Remember the Duct Tape bags? My nieces are now proud owners of them.

Samson and his new guitar!

Avery sporting her new classy bag!

My little Shepard boy

My sweet little angel! (Avery on far left)

Baby Jesus!

Christmas Eve cookie baking and decorating!

Dressed our best

My handsome, photogenic boy

Reading of 'Twas the Night Before Christmas'

Christmas begins with Christ

2010-12-24T09:05:00.000-06:00

Merry Christmas!

Celebrating the true meaning of Christmas...

And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks at night. An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and they were terrified. But the angel said to them, "Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger."

Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying,

"Glory to God in the highest,

and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests."

Luke 2:8 - 14

Duct Tape

2010-12-15T08:47:00.000-06:00

The girls and I have been creating duck tape purses in recent days. It's fun and simple! You can create just about anything with duct tape..even a PROM dress!

Bianca's Story

2010-12-08T08:34:00.001-06:00

A few days ago, I wrote about Rudy and how malnutrition took his life. He is in a better place now - much more comfortable - no longer hungry - no longer struggling to breath - no longer in pain.

Today, I want to share a miracle story about a baby who has survived her battle despite her grim prognosis.

I learned about Bianca when I first arrived in Haiti. There is a young woman from my community who serves in an orphanage in the city of Leogane, just a 30 minute drive from where we were staying in Haiti. Her name is Rhyan. I also have friends who are in the process of adopting 2 girls from the same orphanage.

I tried every effort to go to this orphanage to bring donations and to see my friend's girls but it just wasn't meant to happen.

However, I was able to connect with Rhyan by phone. At the time, she was at the hospital in Carrfour (the same city we were staying) with baby Bianca. She asked if we would pray for her because her health was failing fast. I learned from Rhyan in our brief conversation that she was not expected to live.

To call Rhyan, I had to walk across the street from where we were staying and through our translator, used the neighbor's personal cell phone. I spoke with Rhyan briefly, just enough time to give her the address of where I was staying and Pastor Amos' cell phone number. We were staying at Pastor Amos' home at the time.

That was the last I heard from Rhyan until we arrived home from Haiti.

Once home I learned that Rhyan indeed did call Pastor Amos the very same day. Rhyan asked him to come meet her at the hospital, assuming he would bring me with him.

What I learned is that Pastor Amos walked to the hospital on his own, met Rhyan, prayed over Bianca and baptized her. Bianca was expected to pass away any day.

Rhyan left Haiti that week for a scheduled trip back to the US. She had to leave Bianca behind in the care of the hospital. She was uncertain whether she would see Bianca again.

Bianca was very weak and was going in and out of consciousness when Rhyan left her.

However, instead of passing away, Bianca regained strength. When Rhyan returned back to the orphanage, Bianca had returned to the orphanage!

Since then Bianca has been back in the hospital once but again regained her strength and now is back at the orphanage. The last report is that "she is going to make it." She is a fighter!

In the midst of much suffering and pain in Haiti and around the world, there are stories like Bianca's, stories of miracles and hope. No doubt God has big plans for this precious little one.

Bale's Story

2010-12-03T07:02:00.000-06:00

For those of you who are following Drawn From Water and their story of rescuing children from mandatory infanticide, you may be interested in learning more about Bale, the first child rescued. Go to My Crazy Adoption and read the Wahlberg's adoption story of this beautiful girl.

Broken

2010-12-01T10:14:00.000-06:00

I thought I was broken before my trip to Haiti. I thought I was broken enough when I returned from my trip to Haiti. But God keeps breaking me more and more as weeks pass by.

Obviously, I have a heart for the orphan and with each story of heart ache that I come across I think God can't break me anymore. And then He shows me another story of pain and loss.

Today I want to share one of those stories. It is the story about a little baby boy that I only knew about after returning from Haiti and since has gone to be with Jesus.

First, I have to back up several months when both Olivia and I had a discussion about adopting another child. I had been thinking to myself about a girl. Years ago, our family used to visit a sweet couple at the local nursing home and the woman's name was Ruby. I always liked the name Ruby and thought I would name my daughter Ruby if I ever have another daughter.

Well, during this discussion, Olivia shared with me that she thinks our family should adopt again and she thinks there is a girl named Ruby out there waiting for us.

A couple Sundays ago, Olivia and I had a discussion about Ruby again. Steve has not said 'yes' to another adoption but Olivia and I have been planting seeds for him hoping that some day adopting another child will become 'his' idea. But in the meantime, we talk and dream about a little girl named Ruby.

So, Olivia and I are sitting at the computer on a quest to find Ruby. Recently back from Haiti, we wondered if maybe Ruby is in Haiti. I came across a blog of a family going through their first adoption from Haiti. On there blog was a link to their daughter's orphanage..

We clicked on the link and the first blog post was a post about a little baby boy named "RuDy". Whoa! We were very taken back, especially when we first read it to be "RuBy". We read Rudy's story about his severe malnourishment and that he had just been relinquished to the orphanage.

Then we scrolled down to the next blog post, which was about a little girl named Olivia, a young girl who has a heart for orphans and who rallied her class to raise hundreds of dollars for the orphanage. Double Whoa!!

Baby Rudy has been in my thoughts and prayers. I stumbled upon the same orphanage site again today for the first time since that Sunday. I was struck with great sadness when I learned that Rudy had gone to live with Jesus last Friday. His little body was just too weak. Oh how my heart breaks for God's children who are suffering needlessly.

I don't know what all of this means for our family. But the more God breaks our hearts, the more motivated we are to help in some way. So, we continue to pray for God's guidance and direction. Please pray that our family hears God's specific assignment for us.

Security items

2010-11-30T10:54:00.001-06:00

Today school is closed due to the weather. So, Steve and I were having breakfast together downstairs while the kids were sleeping in. Just as we were finishing our breakfast, I heard one of the bedroom doors upstairs open and slam shut. We knew it was Samson because this is his routine each morning. I met him at the bottom of the stairs, saw this and grabbed my camera:

When we were preparing to bring Samson home, we were informed that it's very important for your child to attach to an item, such as a doll, stuffed animal or blanket. I read many stories of families returning with their toddlers, feeding them formula from a bottle.

So, we were prepared. We arrived in Ethiopia with bottles, pacifiers, blankets and other potential "security" items.

We were advised to introduce these items to our new toddler son as a method of regressing him back to the baby stages. We were also told that if he can attach well to an item, this will help his attachment to us.

So, you can imagine our disappointment when he refused the bottle after several offers. Also, at the care center, we watched him gulp down several cups of the toddler age formula they fed to the toddlers. The first sippy of formula I prepared for him on the plane, he refused and never would drink another drop of formula from that point on.

We tried encouraging him to gravitate to a favorite stuffed animal, blanket or a doll. But he met this with great resistance. He pushed away any potential security item we offered.

Then he received his doll Yunnie for Christmas last year. We thought this was going to be the key to his security item. However, after the first night, Yunnie wasn't that important to him anymore.

Fast forward to preschool show and tell one month ago. I suggested he bring his doll Yunnie. He was so dis-attached from Yunnie that he didn't even remember his name, even after we tried several attempts over the past year to introduce Yunnie as a potential security item, he still forgot his name. Oh and Yunnie was Samson's nick name at the care center and he named his doll Yunnie.

The last few nights I have laid Yunnie by Samson's side so that he would wake up with him and just maybe want to hold him. I always wrap Samson in his blanket each time I put him down. However, each morning he wakes up, he sheds the blanket and leaves Yunnie behind.

Last night when I rocked Samson to sleep, he asked me for the first time if I could rock Yunnie to sleep with him. So, this morning when he came down with both a blanket and Yunnie, I cried. I don't know how much more this will carry on, but I like seeing my son care for his doll this way. I do see the value in having a security item.

I don't know whether his inability to attach to a security item should be a concern or not. But I'm not worried mainly because well, he has attached well to us and us to him. We have made big strides in recent months with attachment, without him being attached to an item.

But what I like about seeing him with a doll and blanket is seeing the gentle, caring side of him. I knew all along that there was this side to him but he has been hiding it up until this point. He has been showing his "I am tough and I can handle life on my own without any comforts" side to us.

He does let us hold him and snuggle with him and we have sweet moments together when I rock him to sleep. But all of these ways that we try to comfort him were also met with resistance up until just a few months ago.

Suppose Samson did show favoritism towards an object for his security when he first joined our family. I admit, I felt like a failure many times at failed attempts to introduce an attachment item. I wondered what we were doing wrong and why it worked for other families and not ours.

But now, I'm starting to wonder if a security item may have gotten in the the way of or delayed his attachment to Steve and I. I am not a psychologist but I also know that when it comes to raising kids, you can't just follow a book. Each child is so different.

This whole blog post is reminding me of our relationship with Christ. We are suppose to put Him first in our lives before anything else. However, how often do we put our security in things and these things get in the way of us trusting Him.

Just maybe Samson has learned to trust us first and put his security in us first. He now is comfortable with us and knows the love of a parent. I'm beginning to think that God wanted our relationship to be the focus. Maybe other security items may have been a distraction?

P.S. Samson just came and informed me that he put Yunnie in a time out. LOL!! Another sign of his love for that doll =)

Shirts are on their way!

2010-11-19T11:10:00.001-06:00

A HUGE Thank You to all of you who supported our 2010 Drawn From Water Limited Edition T-shirt sales!

We had a shirt packaging party this morning and your shirts are on their way!

We sold over 60 shirts total in the past 3 weeks!

100% of profits from the sales of these T-shirts will go to Drawn From Water.

This time it was the right arm

2010-11-16T08:40:00.000-06:00

Another visit to the ER this past weekend confirmed that he broke his right arm just above the elbow. The doctor placed a splint on his arm. The cast would come later after the swelling goes down.

He was such a trooper. The second time around was easier on dad too! We are now too familiar with the broken arm routine.

Two days later, he picked out orange for his cast.

Ask him if he will ever stack up pillows and jump from them again and he will answer, "NO!"

Somebody recommended bubble wrapping him. We are beginning to think that is not such a bad idea :)

Last Day!!!!

2010-11-10T09:05:00.000-06:00

To purchase the new T-shirt!

All proceeds go to Drawn From Water!

FALL FUN

2010-11-01T12:21:00.000-05:00

Relief Efforts

2010-10-27T12:53:00.001-05:00

First, a disclaimer: I don't claim to know everything going on in Haiti. All I can testify to is what I saw and what I heard from the people who live there.

One thing for sure and that is, we don't see much about Haiti on the news anymore. It's almost like we have forgotten about them.

The Haitians I spoke with on the ground there also think we have forgotten about them.

The earthquake was in January. Organizations came flooding into the country to help. Make shift homes were set up for those who lost their homes in the earthquake. Some of these homes have been a stick in the ground with a sheet draped over the stick. Many of these homes have been built with tarps.

On some of these tarps, I saw the words, "US AID" or "Samaritan's Purse" or "UN" or "Unicef". This is just a sample of the organizations who helped the Haitians get into temporary housing until they could rebuild again. I also saw a large tent Doctors Without Boarders set up as a makeshift hospital.

We spent our week in a suburb of Port au Prince, called Carrfour. We learned that Carrfour is the most densely populated city in Haiti. Many homes, orphanages, schools, churches were destroyed or damaged by the quake. Most buildings still standing lost their second stories and higher. It was a rare thing to see a second story building and when we did, the second story looked unsafe and had many visible large cracks.

Looking around, I could not identify one rebuilding project. I confirmed this with our translators as well. People are conducting school in makeshift schools and running orphanages with roof tops missing. For example, the orphanage we visited did not have a roof over their kitchen. I saw many tents that were built for temporary homes, weather worn and tattered. Some 1 million people still remain homeless.

I asked a lot of questions to our English speaking Haitian translators. What they told me is that the money pouring into the country is not getting to the people who need it the most. I was disappointed to also hear from them that some large organizations who mean well have the wrong priorities. Our translators' perspective is that these organization representatives are drive expensive vehicles, eat at the high end restaurants and stay at the 5 star hotels, all while many are starving and homeless.

I emailed one of these organizations expressing my concerns and sharing the perspective of some Haitians and will share their response in another post.

When we arrived at the airport in Port au Prince, we saw this:

This is freight that, from what I understand, has been seized by the Haitian government. The freight includes much needed supplies and food for victims of the earthquake.

There is an election coming up the end of November. There has already been rioting in the capital city. The Haitians are growing tired and weary of waiting. They feel forgotten. They think nobody cares that they are homeless, starving, disease stricken and dieing. When we asked about the elections, the Haitians didn't seem to be hopeful for any candidate. In fact, I did not talk to one person who plans to vote. They don't have any hope in their government.

I left Haiti with a judging heart. Judging the organizations who didn't carry through with their promises; judging the US government for not spending one dime on the relief efforts (check out this link). It seems like we have forgotten them.
Then God told me to look at myself. He asked me what have you done Tammy to help the Haitians? I have done nothing! And I drive an expensive vehicle and I live in a mansion. But now I have seen and God knows my heart, so I cannot pretend that I don't know. God will hold me accountable. I know I can't solve all of Haiti's problems. Any work I do will be insignificant to the overall picture but I still want to do something, even if it makes a difference for one person.

Uncomfortable in Haiti

2010-10-25T08:40:00.001-05:00

God definitely brought me outside my comfort zone in many situations during our time in Haiti. I know God caused me to be uncomfortable so that I could have a taste of the injustice that many are facing in our world today.

Some of us slept in tents in the small backyard of our host home. The first night we arrived, the men set up our tents right next to the outdoor restroom. One thing we saw that night as our tents were being assembled were cock roaches (very large ones I might add!!) on the toilet seat. It was already dark by the time we reached our host home the first night. It was hot. We were all sweating. And that night I went to bed in a tent with my very good friend Lisa, her daughter and my daughter Lauren. We each had a thin mattress for our bed and we didn't need anything to cover us because it was so hot.

About 2 hours into our sleepless night, it began to storm. The wind blew hard and it rained hard. There was loud thunder and lightening. It rained so hard in a short amount of time that our tent began to fill up with water. Our personal belongings were getting wet. The four of us made the decision to grab our mattresses and make a mad dash to the house. Inside, most everyone was awake. There was a lot of commotion but eventually we all settled down with a new sleeping arrangement.

The next morning, after a sleepless night for myself, some of my belongings wet from the storm, I just wanted to cry. I wanted to go home. Our family does not camp, so this was not fun for me.

The second night was a repeat of the first except the water didn't leak into our tent near as much. Lisa and I both woke up at the same time startled. Along with the rain, there was loud music playing nearby. On the other side of us, there was a mixture of animal noises all at once. It sounded like ducks quaking and pigs squealing but we couldn't tell for sure. The louder the music, the louder the animal sounds.

Lisa and I both felt like our tent was surrounded by evil spirits. We were frightened, so once again, we woke up our girls, grabbed our mattresses and headed into the house. And once again, I wanted to go home.

The next morning our team visited a nearby Tent City. We split up into 3 teams. One team went around doing tent repairs, one team walked around and prayed for people and our team handed out shoes and clothing.

We visited with a grandma who lost her home in the earthquake. She was so grateful that God gave her another home - a small tent. She was taking care of her granddaughter. She expressed hope and thankfulness to the Lord.

Her request to us was that we would not forget her. She asked us to pray that God will not take her until His work through her is complete. I believe she asked that she be here on earth when Jesus returns.

We took turns praying over each person we connected with. This time, Lauren prayed over this elderly woman. That was my first breaking moment of the trip.

In the Tent City, we saw dirty water running outside the tents. Most likely water ran into each tent during each rainstorm. We saw very small, sick babies. We saw lice eggs on heads as thick and as big as the beads in tapioca pudding.

We heard stories of people losing loved ones in the earthquake. One woman we prayed over lost her husband in the quake. She was pregnant with their second child at the time. Now she is alone, raising two young children under horrific conditions.

After returning to our host home that afternoon, our team had a debriefing. We were all broken. The tent repair team shared that they built a home for a family that did not have a home. It took them just 30 minutes to assemble a tarp tent. Just under 10 months since the earthquake and this family was without a home up until this point. And to think that it took only 30 minutes to build.

That night I went to bed with a greater appreciation for shelter. Rainstorm or not, Lisa and I decided that we were going to stick it out all night. I was reminded that no matter how bad you have it, there is always someone somewhere in the world that has it much worst.

Back from Haiti!

2010-10-23T16:19:00.004-05:00

Lauren and I arrived home with our team last night. I have so many stories to share about our adventure but for now, I want to share this story of giving and receiving.

The picture above is of Pastor Amos and his sweet wife Ellie Anna, our hosts during our week long stay in Carrfour, Haiti - a suburb of Port Au Prince. After the earthquake, this couple took in 3 other pastors and their families who lost their homes. Altogether around 30 people live in their compound.

Ellie Anna was up each morning by 4:00 a.m. to begin preparations for the day's meals. She selflessly spent the greater portion of each day preparing 2 meals a day for our team. Each day, she served our team with a very sweet, humble and joyful servant heart.

Later in the week, I learned that the dinners that she prepared for us each evening are meals that are only prepared for VIPs. We ate like Kings and Queens during our stay. The rest of the families living in the compound I'm sure did not eat near as good.

We were blessed beyond words!

Prior to leaving for our trip, I packed clothes that I purchased at the local thrift store and some of my own. I had only found 1 skirt at the thrift store that would work for my trip so decided to pack one I already owned, about the only skirt I own.

One day, Ellie Anna came and greeted me outside my tent. She did not speak English and I of course did not speak Creole. So, we communicated through hand gestures. She appeared to be asking if she could have my tent when we were done with it. We had planned on leaving our tents in Haiti anyway, so I told her I would be happy to leave my tent with her. She asked me something else, which I didn't quite understand but I assumed she was asking about the tent again, just to confirm that we understood each other. I said 'yes' to her again.

The second to the last morning of our stay in Haiti, I gathered up all the clothes I was going to leave behind in one bag and gave the bag to our female translator. She was grateful to receive these clothes and was going to give them to a sister who was in need of them.

That evening, as we were packing to leave, Ellie Anna and her husband approached me and asked for my clothes. Her husband, who knew very little English informed me that I had offered to leave my clothes with Ellie Anna. Whether I did or not doesn't matter. This is what Ellie Anna understood and I did not want to let her down.

While in Haiti, we heard over and over that groups will come into an orphanage, church, school or wherever, make promises and not deliver on their promises.

Ellie Anna and her husband were staring at me waiting for a reply. I stumbled with my words, which caused them to look confused. I knew I had to act quick.

I had packed up all the clothes that I wanted to bring home with me, which included a skirt that I did not want to give up and a shirt that I also wanted to keep. Without waiting a moment longer, I dug for the skirt and the shirt, found them rolled up in my carry on and presented them to Ellie Anna. I have to admit, I felt my stomach lurch as I handed over my favorite skirt and one of my favorite shirts. But I would have felt worse leaving her with nothing. She kindly smiled and accepted my offering.

Then something unexpected happened. No more than 5 minutes after I handed these pieces of clothing over to Ellie Anna, someone from our group came in the house with a bag full of clothes and wanted to know whose they were. It was the bag of clothes I had given to the translator that morning. Our transltor must have forgotten to take it with her when we saw her for the last time.

I feel extremely guilty about this now, but at first I could not help think about how I would still have my skirt and top that were difficult to give away if I knew about my bag of clothes that was so easy for me to give away. I'm especially ashamed of my feelings despite all that Ellie Anna had sacraficed for our team.

I can't help but think about God's perfect timing in this situation. He had planned all along that I would give my best skirt and shirt to Ellie Anna.

To be honest, if I would have known about my bag being left behind, I would have handed this bag over to Ellie Anna instead. God knew this too. Thus, his perfect timing caused me to be obedient.

God does not want us to give only when it is easy.

Earlier in the week a few of us girls from our group volunteered to sing 'Blessed Be Your Name' up front during a church service. This was not a coincidence.

Now I know truly what it means when we sing the lyrics 'I give and take away' and 'There is pain in the offering'.

God wants us to know and feel the sacrifice of giving. If it's too easy to give, it's not a sacrifice.

The morning we boarded our bus for the airport, I looked out the window of the bus one last time before we departed and standing there in the early morning hours, waving good-bye, was Ellie Anna, wearing my shirt.

I am so grateful that God has taught me the lesson of giving until there is pain in the offering. Seeing someone in much greater need than I wearing my 'valued' pocession brought great joy to my heart.

This is just the start of God breaking me down. He tested my obedience. And this was just a small item - a piece of clothing. It now seems ridiculous to even allow pain through this kind of offering. Because no doubt God will test me on much bigger things to come.

New Item in Store!

2010-10-16T07:24:00.002-05:00

Go to http://drawnfromwaterstore.blogspot.com/ for the details.

A 21st Century Version of Mathew 25

2010-10-08T12:30:00.004-05:00

"For I was hungry, while you had all you needed. I was thirsty, but you drank bottled water. I was a stranger, and you wanted me deported. I needed clothes, but you needed more clothes. I was sick, and you pointed out the behaviors that led to my sickness. I was in prison, and you said I was getting what I deserved."

By Richard E. Stearns, President of World Vision.

Just a teaser!

2010-10-06T13:00:00.002-05:00

There is something new coming to the Drawn From Water Store! Can you guess what it is??!!!!!

First Day of School

2010-10-05T17:14:00.001-05:00

This morning when Samson came downstairs, all the girls started hooting and hollering at him - they were just as excited as he was for his first day of preschool. Samson played right into their screams of excitement and showed us some dance moves, shaking his booty and proclaiming, "Yay! I'm going to preschool!" He is an amazing dancer and fun to watch!

I held back tears this morning when I was preparing him for his first day of preschool.

He was so excited and I was so excited for him that I didn't actually cry when I dropped my baby off.

What a blessing his two teachers are. It's yellow day today!

He went right to work cutting up straws!

Seeing his beautiful smile at the end of the day was a good sign all went well. I got a little teary eyed watching my big boy come out of his first day of school.

He couldn't wait to show us and his friends the project he created - a yellow star!

There's my boy!

Preparing for Haiti

2010-10-04T20:01:00.003-05:00

My daughter Lauren and I will be in Haiti on October 16th. We will be going with 14 other adults and teenagers from our community and serving along side Adventures In Missions (AIM).

We will be bringing our own tents and other sleeping devices. Our facilities include one cold shower and one bucket shower available to us for the week. We also have one toilet. The average temperature will be 90 degrees.

Our assignment includes, prayer walking, tent repair, rubble clean up, sports ministry and helping in an orphanage. Serving in an orphanage would be my dream but I'm not setting any expectations because they tell us to remain flexible since our assignment can change daily. I will serve in what ever capacity God leads me to serve.

Two close friends of mine will be making this trip with me and two of Lauren's close friends are also going. I am very excited to travel this journey, serving those in need with my friends. But I'm most looking forward to the mother-daughter time Lauren and I will have together.

When we first signed up to go, Lauren insisted on paying her own way, which we did not want to argue with her about. So, she sold pizzas to raise funds and she also sent out support letters. The main purpose for the support letter is to 1. ask friends and family to cover her in prayer and 2. ask for financial assistance.

God is good because just before we had to turn in our support money, she reached her goal. Thank you to all who are lifting her in prayer and supporting her financially! Thank you for believing in her! You are all a huge blessing!

We just started our malaria meds yesterday. The doctor recommended taking them 2 weeks prior to departing. Shots wise, we didn't have to do anything because we were already immunized from our Ethiopian trip.

Oh yeah, we have already had team bonding times. We have gathered as a team for several training sessions and we held a pancake breakfast fundraiser:

The team worked hard to keep the pancakes replenished in the serving line:

God will use us when we are available - Rick Warren

God's willing servants:

Lauren was our sausage maker.

She stood over the hot stove for 5 hours and did not complain once:

I'm Back!!!

2010-10-03T22:37:00.002-05:00

I'm Back to the blogging world. Sorry for the dry spell on my blog. I have too much to share and not enough time to share everything.

The first news I need to share is that Samson starts school on ... Tuesday! Yes - that's right! He is going to preschool. I registered him for school way back in the Spring but he was put on a waiting list because of his age, even though he did make the age cut off. This was a very sore subject for me because I believe we were treated unfairly but those details will probably not make it any further than an UNpublished post. But believe me when I say that I suffered a lot of agony over this whole preschool ordeal.

Anyway, he was on a waiting list and just last week, 1 month after school started, the teacher calls and says that a child dropped out of preschool and Samson is next in line. If we wanted to send him, he could start next week.

After much prayer and discussion, we decided to enroll him.

I promise a blog post on Tuesday with pictures. As excited I am for him and as much as I think he needs this, I can't believe that I will be sending my youngest off to preschool - my last first day of preschool =(

Since the girls started school this fall, Samson and I have had a lot of bonding time together. We go for bike rides, walks, jump on the trampoline, play at the park, play t-ball. During these special times together, he has opened up to me more and more. He asks to look at his special photo album more often and now that he can speak better English, he has many more questions about his past.

It's interesting to watch him piece it all together from the questions that he asks. He has been asking a lot about death. He has been asking some very simple but intelligent questions for his age about economics, like "Why don't we just give poor people money mommy?" He is so smart!

One assumption that he is having a hard time letting go of is the idea that all children come from the care center in Ethiopia. We talk about the care center a lot. He looks at his pictures from his social report of himself and all his care center friends. I have had many conversations with him and told him that he came from his Ethiopian mommy's tummy his sisters came from my tummy.

I can see the confusion and pain in his eyes when he hears about how his story is different. There is no question that some of the truth about his story hurts him.

He continues to ask to see Avery's pictures from when "she was in the care center". He has even searched through her room looking for her photo album. He also thinks that Avery came out of his Ethiopian mommy's tummy. One day he insisted on being the one who came out of my tummy.

We have so much more to share with him about his story - some even harder stuff that we will share when he is older. I have read other's stories about sharing the hard stuff with their adopted child but now that I am sharing with my own son, I have a really difficult time knowing how to word things the way he would understand it at his age. It's like peeling one layer of the onion back at a time, crying more and more each layer.

A few weeks ago, the girls came across their baby pictures. Again, he is so smart because he asked for his baby pictures. I showed him his referral pictures and tried to explain to him that that is how old he was when he joined our family. He still said, "That is not a baby mommy." "Where are my baby pictures?"

We embrace his rich birth culture, his skin tone and differences positively. But he doesn't like being the different family member. So, we work hard at pointing out similarities, such as you look just like your father when you wear your shirt tucked in with your belt or you have the same colored eyes as Olivia and Lauren.

He knows he has different colored skin than us but right now this difference doesn't seem to bother him. I tell him that I am going to nibble on some milk chocolate ears and he tells me that he is going to nibble on some white chocolate ears and we each pretend to munch on each other's ears.

The other day, just out of the blue, he was admiring his legs and said, "Mommy! T____'s legs look like mine!" He was proud of that! T____ is one of his care center friends who we have visited a couple times since we have been home.

But in public places, I have seen other kids stop and stare at him. Some day he will notice this too.

Speaking of public places, isn't it amazing what questions acquaintances or strangers will ask in front of your kids?

Yesterday at a football games, I had a woman tap me on the shoulder, pointed right down at Samson and asked, "Where did you get him?"

On another subject, Lauren and I leave for Haiti in less than 2 weeks. I will post more details about our trip soon but what I have just learned is that part of our trip includes serving in an orphanage. Kind of dangerous, huh?!

Meet Kero!

2010-09-20T10:27:00.002-05:00

Isn't she beautiful?!!

Our family has the privilege of helping sponsor Kero through Drawn From Water . We knew DFW was coming out with a new sponsorship program, so when they announced it last week, we jumped on board right away.

Really, all the kids are amazing and beautiful but when I asked our kids whether they wanted to sponsor a girl or a boy, they all agreed a girl and they all wanted the oldest girl. That's how we found Kero. When we pulled up her file, my girls said, "Yes! Her! Let's sponsor her!"

The day after we signed up to sponsor Kero, we received an email confirmation and a little bit more information on her. We learned that she was attending her third day of school. Reading this brought me to tears because she is attending the very same school we toured with our agency in Addis one year ago. The school is Children's Home Academy. We were so impressed with this school and what they had to offer.

I think about all the schools there must in Addis - our sponsored child could be attending one of probably hundreds of schools. But she is sitting in the same classrooms that we walked through just over a year ago.

Not only that, but Kero will learn English at her new school. Eventually, we will be able to write letters back and forth to her.

Friday morning, after we received confirmation that we would be indeed sponsoring Kero, I was wearing my DFW T-shirt and as I was driving the girls to school, I looked down at my T-shirt and there I saw Kero's name. Her name is on the shirt because she was one of the first eight children rescued.

Kero is six years old. In January, 2009, she was rescued from the Hammer tribe in Ethiopia. She was suppose to be killed by the elders because she was "teeth mingi", which means her top teeth came in before her bottom teeth.

Unfortunately, like all the children at the DFW orphanage, Kero is not adoptable, which is why this sponsorship program is so important for these kids.

Would you please consider sponsoring ones of these precious children? You can help sponsor a child for as little as $25 per month. When you sponsor a child, you will get several more pictures and more information about them. DFW will send frequent updates and you may email DFW specific questions about your child any time.

As DFW stated on a recent twitter, "How often can you say that you were able to help a child who would have otherwise been killed by their tribe?"

New Child Sponsorship Program!

2010-09-16T20:39:00.000-05:00

Drawn From Water just announced their new Child Sponsorship Program. Go here to read the details and check out these beautiful children!

In less than 5 weeks...

2010-09-13T21:47:00.002-05:00

...Lauren and I leave for Haiti. We are going with a team of 14 other people from our community.

Making the decision to go was not an easy one because both Lauren and I have been looking forward to going back to Ethiopia, possibly next summer, possibly our entire family and possibly for more than a short time.

And although we have not let go of our vision to some day return to Ethiopia, the closer we get to next summer, the more unlikely we will be going back that soon for various reasons.

Lauren and I share the same passion and desire - to travel overseas and serve the poor. This will be our first missions trip together and we are excited to see what possibilities are out there for us.

Like I said, this decision did not come easy. In fact, I kind of feel like I'm betraying Ethiopia. Ethiopia is where are hearts are.

But when we saw this opportunity to join a team going to Haiti to serve in tent cities and help clean up rubbish, among other things, Lauren pleaded with us to let her go. She also has a cool testimony on how she received confirmation from the Lord that she is suppose to do this trip.

Steve and I didn't want her going without one of us and we just couldn't say no to her.

So, we signed up and I asked the Lord to close a door quick if we are not to go and we trusted that He would give me some confirmation along the way.

One week after we turned in our money and registration, we received a packet of information through our leader from AIM (Adventures In Missions), the organization who will be directing us in Haiti.

In this information, it described the location where we will serve in Port au Prince and it is called FON TAMARA.

TAMARA is my birth name!

Isn't that cool?!! I will take that as a confirmation that I should be going on this trip!

Anyway, we will be staying in a compound with fence all around, a locked gate and barbwire. The temperatures will be in the 90s! We will be sleeping in tents. Our family has NEVER camped.

Please pray for our team as we prepare and train for our 1 week trip. Please pray that the Lord is paving the way for us and putting protectors in place before we arrive. Please pray that God prepares each of our hearts to be ready to respond and fulfill great needs. Pray for Steve, Lauren, Avery and Samson, that they find peace in their own hearts over us going.

I am nervous about leaving the family for this length of time, especially Samson. Our attachment is going amazingly well. So, please pray that this time away does not cause a disruption with our attachment progress.

Back to School

2010-09-07T11:46:00.000-05:00

The girls returned to school this morning. They were all excited but a little nervous. I was not looking forward to this day because it was so nice to have them home over the summer, so I'm a little sad right now.

At one time in my life, I thrived on routine. I craved routine when school started up each fall.

But now, I am not so thrilled about routine, school, school work, signing permission forms, correcting Math homework (especially not excited about this - Math has never been my strength=-), more events on the calendar, getting all the kids up each morning at the crack of dawn, the rat race of getting ready for the school day, driving them to school, dropping them off, returning home to gather something one of the girls forgot and delivering it to school, and all the other hassles that start with the school year.

No, I was not ready to be thrown into a routine but the start of the school year comes whether we like it or not. So, I learn to adjust to a new mindset and a new schedule. I'll survive but still, this is hard...

We've accomplished it!

2010-09-03T21:16:00.000-05:00

Potty Trained!!

Distance does make the heart grow fonder

2010-08-31T09:28:00.000-05:00

A few weeks ago, I had the opportunity to accompany my daughter Lauren on a youth group trip. I was away from home for three days, the longest I've ever been apart from Samson. I don't like being apart from my kids like this and I did worry what this would mean for my relationship with Samson.

I called home a couple time to check in and talked to Steve and each of the kids. Everything seemed to be going just fine. However, Steve did mention that Samson was a little out of sorts. I knew this trip would be hard on him but it was also very hard on mom to hear this and not be able to hold and comfort my little man.

When Lauren and I arrived home, the garage door was open and Samson was standing there in a full Barney costume, stuffed with pillows. When he saw me, he began to cry and tried walking toward me but stumbled and fell, rolling around in his costume.

I went right to him, picked up my wobbly, pillow filled Barney and just held him tight.

He continued to cry as we held each other as tight as we could manage until I could free him from his costume.

I kept asking him, "Did you miss mommy?"
No answer. But I told him how much I missed him and loved him.
Then I asked him, "Do you love mommy?"
No answer. Not even eye contact. But we continued to hold each other tight and his tears eventually turned into laughter. He was then happy but still no eye contact.

Later in the day, I asked him again, "Did you miss mommy?" Still no answer. Still no eye contact.

Then on Monday, after I was home for two days, unsolicited, he turned to me with his beautiful smile and said, "I love you Mommy! (long pause)...and I missed you!"

Man do I love this boy!!

Maybe you shouldn't let a three year old

2010-08-29T15:52:00.000-05:00

manage a kite on his own...

unless you want to watch the kite fly through the air when he decides he's tired of hanging onto it and lets go;

unless you want some exercise running after the kite's string as the wind lifts it higher and higher in the air;

unless you want to watch the kite go through an evergreen thinking for a second that there is hope of rescuing it;

unless you want to watch the kite be carried through the evergreen to the power lines;

unless you want to watch the kite string get caught in the power line while the kite continues to fly high;

No, it's probably not a good idea to let a three year old manage a kite...

unless you want your blood pressure to go up while watching the kite fly over a very busy road as the string is still attached to the power line, praying that the kite doesn't take a nose dive right into an on coming car or motorcyclist, causing an accident;

not unless you want to call the local power company and wait impatiently until they get to the scene;

not unless you want to watch nervously the employee from the power company be raised in the bucket to untangle the kite string from the power line and whip the string across the road hoping not to hit a car;

not unless you want to watch your husband dodge traffic to fetch the kite that landed on the roof of the assistant living place.

Luckily nobody got hurt and the kite seemed to have survived as well. But enough drama for one day!

117!!!

2010-08-27T12:00:00.001-05:00

Yeah!!!

117 Drawn From Water T-shirts sold!!

We are blown away and very encouraged by this number!

If you haven't purchased yours yet, go to their STORE and purchase your very own. I have one in each color and they have become my "uniform" for the summer.

Not only do these T-shirts strike up conversations and help spread the word about this amazing organization but hey are light weight, great for the summer but also great for layering over a long sleeve shirt in the Fall and Winter seasons.

Oh, and I'll let you in on a little known secret: a little bird shared with me that there is another item coming to the store soon for only a limited time!

More details to follow!! I'll share once I know all the details but what I know so far, I guarantee you will love it!

Another new endeavor

2010-08-25T08:44:00.001-05:00

I have so much to blog about, that I don't know where to begin. A lot of changes have happened in our family over the summer, lots of decisions have been made and still need to be made. I have so much to share but for this post, I'll share how Steve's work world has been changing.

Several months ago, Steve was approached by a friend who owns a banner printing business. This friend was interested in taking Steve on as a partner to grow the business. After much prayer and consideration, Steve is now transitioning into his entrepreneur position from his CFO position.

When our family returned home from Ethiopia last August, our friends welcomed us home with this Banner placed in our front lawn:

(P.S. Ignore my attempt to take our last name off the banner through Paint.)

Being part-owner in a business has always been Steve's dream. We know there are risks involved in "going on your own" but we just felt like the time and opportunity were right for Steve and our family.

So, here is a shameless plug for Steve's new endeavor:

If you are looking for a banner, for your business, reunion, birthday, any kind of celebration, flags (Ethiopian? hint! hint!) or whatever, go to

http://www.banners.com/

They ship everywhere in the US!!

(Print a Welcome Home banner for your friends!)